Procrastination is productivity’s number one enemy. There have been hundreds of books written on the subject, yet we still collectively suffer from procrastination. Perfectionism creates more procrastination and we often find ourselves stuck in the perfectionism/procrastination loop without addressing the root of the behavior. Identifying the root of these behaviors is what the British self-help coach Rick William does with his clients.
According to William, perfectionism is a survival strategy that protects us from the fear of rejection and helps us avoid feeling shame. “This is a brilliant survival strategy to keep you safe but is also keeping you from greater professional and personal success” shared the self-help coach. Procrastination can sometimes arise as perfectionism to prevent our work from being put out into the world so we can avoid judgment from others. When these strategies are activated, we stay in our comfort zone by only expressing or sharing what we consider to be ‘perfect’ which stops us from growing and creating.
Perfectionism comes from a fixed mindset that focuses on mistakes and seeks to avoid judgment. Someone that desires to cultivate excellence has a growth mindset and focuses on learning through mistakes so perfectionism gets in the way of excellence. When asked about what someone could do to break out of this loop, William shared “every survival behavior we exhibit is trying to avoid a specific negative feeling, our system is essentially trying to keep us safe, however safe can sometimes mean stuck. Shame and fear are the root emotions of perfectionism and procrastination so we need to connect with these emotions and allow ourselves to fully feel them, so that we can release them.” Luckily, there are ways of breaking these patterns “creating disconfirming experiences that show our nervous system that it is still safe even when things are not perfect is key in breaking the loop” he added.
William shared a few exercises that help rewire the brain to break this loop:
In relationships or partnerships allow yourself to make mistakes and work on repairing them. Our nervous system learns through experience so when we make a mistake and repair it, we are letting our nervous system know that we are still safe and loved even when we are not showing up perfectly.
Allow yourself to put out work that is slightly wrong and remind yourself that you are still safe. Cultivate feelings of safety when you do this so your body can learn that nothing bad happens when you make a mistake. Let this land in your body as you practice this exercise.
“When you practice this be prepared to see your finances, relationships, and overall satisfaction grow significantly” added William as a closing remark.
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