Editorial

Clean Those Toenails, Fellas. Nordstrom Wants To Sell You Lady Shoes

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Kay Smythe News and Commentary Writer
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Call the ghost of Joan Rivers. We need the fashion police.

Department store giant Nordstrom is trying to sell women’s shoes to men, and they’re literally the ugliest things you could put near your feet.

Imagine the surprise felt by my friend’s mother when she found these shoes while searching for something new for her husband. These were not quite the summer sandals she was hoping her hubs would be sporting.

Before we get into this, let me just say that I don’t care what clothes you choose to wear. Almost no one does, except maybe for your mother on a Sunday. But it feels almost like trolling to advertise some of the ugliest sandals on the planet to men who would prefer to wear women’s shoes.

Screenshot/Nordstrom

Apparently the BP Be Proud Fenix Slide Sandal is gender inclusive, but the size says it all. The sandal fits large for women, so we’re recommended to buy a half-size smaller. For men, the sandal is true to size… because it’s a man’s shoe. It’s not “gender inclusive” at all, not that anyone of any pronoun or whatever should wear this fashion faux pas.

Part of me thinks that the designer must hate transgender biological males for creating something so awful. The most abusive thing about these sandals? The colors.

They come in either shiny silver or glimmery rainbow. This only begs one question: literally why? (RELATED: Kamala And Biden Continue Their War Against American Women And Children)

A quick search of Nordstrom’s other “gender inclusive” shoes proved to basically be either real or knock-off Converse and various other virtue-signally rainbow nightmares. The other items sold by the designer were actually kind of cute and very modern. Maybe they were just really drunk when they created these sandals?

Nothing makes sense anymore.

Like I said, no one cares how you dress. If someone is going to judge you for your clothing, they’re not the type of person you need in your life. The only issues most women have with men wearing our clothes are (a) you stretch them out, (b) you wear them while competing in our sports, and (c) you don’t need to dress like a Barbie prostitute or porn star to make a statement.

Of course, none of the above applies to men who wear crocs and those who keep their hats on during meals. Neither of these fashion choices are protected, and y’all belong in jail for such behavior. Rant over.