HART: Dispatches From Freedom-Loving Sturgis, South Dakota, And Wyoming

(Photo by Alexander Hassenstein/Getty Images)

Ron Hart Ron Hart is a libertarian humorist and author who can be reached at Ron@RonaldHart.com.
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With gas prices at all-time highs, what could be a better time to embark on an RV trip to South Dakota and Wyoming? The good news is that it’s my friend’s RV; the bad news is that I am paying for gas. I filled up the 55-gallon tank and then suggested we call the insurance agent to increase the coverage value.

It was good to leave the South and head to the cooler mountains. Right now it is hotter than a Hunter Biden spoon in Florida.

You learn a lot when you know little about something. Since TV coverage was scant, in a vain attempt to flex my manhood I offered to hook up the TV in the RV.  In my search to find how these modern smart TVs work, I discovered written on the back of the TV “Built-in-Antenna.” I didn’t say it out loud, but I did think, “What country is that in?”

We started out in Sturgis, South Dakota, a week or so before its famous motorcycle rally. It is so freedom-loving Republican out here in Sturgis that it chafes the left. They got all bent out of shape about the last Sturgis gathering, calling it a “super-spreader event.” All the good people of Sturgis had to do to get the lefties off their backs would have been to call it a “DNC” or “BLM” gathering of donors; the press would not have said a thing. 

There are a lot of Native American Sioux out here, and they, too, seem conservative. And unlike the tribes in Massachusetts that Sen. Elizabeth Warren self-identified with, these Sioux like their Second Amendment. They take issue with Warren’s position that citizens should not have guns — only the government. If Sen. Warren were a real Indian, she would understand why that was once a bad idea for her people and still is. 

Spending time in Wyoming made clear to me that they hate their Rep. Liz Cheney almost as much as she hates Trump. Having struck out with the “January 6th” show trial, Nancy Pelosi and Cheney are plotting their next “get Trump” stunt. Trump was in Florida when his ex-wife, Ivana, fell down and died in New York, but Pelosi will tie him to the crime. Congressional investigators and third-hand hearsay witness actors are auditioning right now for the fall season of the Democrats’ continuing drama, “Get Trump.”

It is a brilliant move by Democrats to try to eliminate from the 2024 presidential race the only Republican they could beat. 

Fortunately, Cheney trails an African-American woman named Harriet Hageman by 32 points in the primaries. A whopping 1% of Wyoming is black, so those racist Republicans are not acting like the white supremacists they are supposed to be.

We are traveling to Idaho too. Which reminds me of an old joke. Why are there only 49 Miss USA contestants? No one wants to be Miss I-da-ho. 

I am only getting bits and pieces of the news out here, but this is what I understand happened recently:

  1. Biden announced he had cancer, then miraculously cured himself the next day. Then he got COVID. He’s well taken care of. (Thank goodness his wife is a doctor.) The fawning media show him resting with his dog, which is just a ploy to assure plausible deniability when the staff finds pee on the rugs. 
  2. To get himself back to full strength and his gaffe machine up and running again, Biden took a week off and gave us all a respite from his leadership “skills.” Perhaps the Surgeon General will convince Biden to take another month off in order to give food, oil and inflation time to heal. His sitting things out and not doing anything is better for all of us — including Biden. He sat out the 2020 presidential election in his basement and damn near won. 
  3. Ben Affleck married J-Lo. If J-Lo stays healthy, she can beat Liz Taylor’s marriage record. I thought Ben Affleck was banned from gambling. There is a pre-nup of course, wherein they agree to share the breakup publicity 50-50. 

There will be grammar errors this week as my phenomenal editor of 15 years, the “Princess of Punctuation,” enjoys her 50th wedding anniversary. Sincere thanks, congratulations and Rock Chalk Jayhawk to Michelle Covert and Capt. Duane Covert. 

Ron Hart is a syndicated op-ed humorist, award-winning author, and TV/radio commentator; you can reach him at Ron@RonaldHart.com or Twitter @RonaldHart.