Can The 2022 Santa Clara Men’s Cross Country Team Become My New Drinking Buddies Please?


Kay Smythe News and Commentary Writer
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Step aside dude who had amazing hair on C-SPAN that one time, the 2022 Santa Clara Men’s Cross Country team has just proven themselves to have the greatest style in modern American history.

In all of my 28-years on this planet, I have never ever seen a more epic collective of young men than those representing Santa Clara in the sport of cross country running in the year of our Lord, 2022. Clearly everyone in this superior group of male specimens understood the assignment when taking their official team photograph this year. Please bare witness below:

So let’s start with my top five favorites of these strapping lads… just kidding, they’re all winners in my book, each bringing their own unique spin to what will go down in history as the greatest team photograph of all time. Take, for example, the smoldering glow and half-stache of the gentleman on the bottom right row. What a gosh darn genius this chap is, eh?

Or, can we please praise the man in the upper middle right who looks like he may have sharted as the photograph was being taken. Then there’s bowl cut, who is, scientifically speaking, bringing sexy back. Seriously, C-SPAN guy didn’t have a shot.

From the head hair and facial artwork, to the eyes, to the pouts, the steely gaze of upper center-right, the borderline tears of bottom center-left, there is not and never will be a single loser amongst these men. (RELATED: Dear Kay: I’m A Liberal Woman Who Is Deeply Attracted To Conservative Men. Why?)

My hope is that the entire planet learns something from the Santa Clara Men’s Cross Country team about friendship, teamwork, community, and most importantly, fashion. If you want to see the entire lineup of epic track stars in the making, you can head over to the official SC Broncos website.