Editorial

Aaron Rodgers Wants To Get To London Early So He Can Drink Beer, Experience The Culture

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Kay Smythe News and Commentary Writer
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Green Bay Packers legend Aaron Rodgers is traveling to London to play the New York Giants on Sunday, but apparently wanted to get there sooner to enjoy British culture.

“We’re all excited. I think the reason I said I wanted to go over early was just to experience a little bit of that culture, to be able to get out and see some sights and interact with fans and … shoot, go to a pub and have a Guinness or whatever the local brew is. That’s what we all want to do, those of us that want to go over early,” Rodgers said Wednesday, according to ESPN.

Okay so firstly, if you’re going to a pub in London, the drinks of choice are: a Pimms cup, pint of lager, at least three Jaeger bombs, and then maybe a few gin and tonics. Aaron mate (your official British title) if you want to avoid causing a diplomatic incident, you should really drink all of these in a single hour and then go to the next pub down whatever street you’re on and do the same.

No trip to London is complete without an Indian takeaway that you are legally required to vomit up either on the street or the following morning into the loo at your exceedingly overpriced Airbnb. Or, if you’re really looking to lean into being a Brit, Rodg’ mate, you can throw up on the London tube (subway) and have a security guard rub your back and say “awh bless, y’alright bub? Heavy night, was it?” (as I once did from heavy drinking as a teenager).

Thankfully, whatever is left over from your Indian takeaway the night before is exactly what you’re going to want the next morning. But if you’re a real man, you’ll have finished it in full and be ready for a fry-up (full English breakfast) before yet another pint. (RELATED: Researchers Discover 279-Year-Old UFO Mystery Over London, England)

Don’t be concerned about all this drinking before your “football” match (it’s called “American football” in the U.K., or “slow rugby” if you’re Welsh). Be concerned about getting stabbed by hooligans.

Anyway, that’s my recommendations for Aaron Rodgers’ cultural exploration in London. Oh, and there are museums and history and stuff too, if you’re into that.

*the author of this post is Welsh, not English