DC Trawler

Our long national nightmare is over: Olbermann to return tomorrow

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MSNBC’s “indefinite” suspension just got a lot more definite. The shadowy and capricious Phil Griffin — Olbermann’s boss, or so he thinks — issued the following statement last night:

“After several days of deliberation and discussion, I have determined that suspending Keith through and including Monday night’s program is an appropriate punishment for his violation of our policy. We look forward to having him back on the air Tuesday night.”

Why Tuesday night and not Monday night? Because Phil Griffin said so, that’s why!

Via William Kristol, who called for Olbermann’s reinstatement immediately upon hearing the news and now says: “You’re welcome, Keith.” Olbermann’s gratitude will surely extend to Kristol’s fellow evilmongers like Hugh Hewitt, Greg Gutfeld, and our own Mary Katharine Ham, all of whom called for MSNBC to put Keith back in his high chair and let him bang his spoon on the tray.

After days of suspenseful silence, yesterday Olbermann reassured his adoring masses on Twitter:

Greetings From Exile! A quick, overwhelmed, stunned THANK YOU for support that feels like a global hug & obviously left me tweetless XO

XO indeed, my friend. XO indeed!

And thus ends the gravest injustice in the history of the United States, if not the world. Or… does it?? If Mike Allen’s sources are correct, Olbermann was suspended because he refused to apologize on the air for donating to Democratic candidates without informing anybody. Does that mean he’s going to tell his viewers he’s suh… suh, suh… that he’s suh… Oh, help me out here, Elton!

Can Keith say the words? Will it be a mea culpa, or is there some way he can blame Bill O’Reilly instead? No matter what, he’s sure to give us yet another Youtube moment to savor. As always, stay tuned to KeithOlbermann.com for the latest!

P.S. In 2004, Keith Olbermann said MSNBC’s election office pool was a “conflict of interest.”

P.P.S. It just keeps getting better and better…