Happy Birthday, Mr. President! Happy! Birth! Day! To! You!
The sound of helicopters over the Chicago lakefront today signaled the practice drills that accompany a presidential visit. And with Congress poised to act on a deal to raise the federal debt ceiling, President Barack Obama’s plans to return to his hometown and engage in some fundraising are back on.
Obama is scheduled to attend a 50th birthday gala on Wednesday at the Aragon Ballroom, an event featuring Jennifer Hudson and Herbie Hancock. There’s also a dinner fundraiser planned for some special donors to go with the show at a cost of $35,800 a person.
As has been the case, fundraising dollars are being split between Obama’s 2012 re-election fund and the Democratic National Committee.
Obama’s attendance at the fundraiser had been in doubt during the lengthy debt and deficit debate in Washington, until the president announced Sunday that a deal had been reached with House and Senate leaders.
Whew! See, because money is bad unless you’re giving it to Obama. Then money becomes good, because he’s Obama. Or maybe this is a giant sting operation? Maybe he’s trying to get all the corporate jets in one place so he can confiscate them for the proletariat?
Thanks to Vice President Biden and the rest of these geniuses who are smarter than the rest of us because they’re so intelligent, now we know that the word “terrorist” has been officially downgraded from “indiscriminate murderer” to “guy who’s not going to vote for us anyway.” And now we have a second definition: “Terrorist: anybody who interferes with Obama’s fundraising efforts.” If you keep Jennifer Hudson waiting in the wings, the terrorists win.