DC Trawler

Remember when it was okay for a 7th-grade boy to burp in class?

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Well, maybe it wasn’t okay, exactly. It was considered rude and you’d be chastised. But it was tolerated because, y’know, it was 7th grade. And it was only a burp.

That’s what you think!


A 13-year-old was handcuffed and hauled off to a juvenile detention for burping in class, according to a civil rights lawsuit filed against an Albuquerque public school principal, a teacher and a city police officer.

The suit was filed Wednesday, the same day the district was also sued by the family of a 7-year-old autistic boy who was handcuffed to a chair.

The Albuquerque Journal reports the unnamed seventh grader was arrested last May 11 at Cleveland Middle School after he “burped audibly” in his P.E. class. “Criminalizing of the burping of a thirteen-year-old boy serves no governmental purpose,” the lawsuit said. “Burping is not a serious disruption, a threat of danger was never an issue.”

So it wasn’t even a real class: it was Phys Ed. How the hell is a 13-year-old boy supposed to get through an entire P.E. class without burping? Might as well arrest him for breathing.

And handcuffing an autistic kid to a chair? Are they insane?

In other Zero Tolerance/cowardly school administrator news, the Boston Globe reports:

A Boston elementary school is investigating a 7-year-old first-grader for sexual harassment after he struck another boy his age in the groin.

But the mother of the accused said her son was fending off the other child, who had choked him in an altercation on a school bus on Nov. 22.

“I think my kid was right to fight back,” said the mother, Tasha Lynch, 30. “He wasn’t doing anything except protecting himself…”

Matthew Wilder, spokesman for the Boston public schools, declined to comment on the incident or why it has been classified as a possible case of sexual harassment. He said officials do not discuss confidential student information.

“Any kind of inappropriate touching would fall under that category,” Wilder said. “The school administration is conducting a full investigation that has not concluded yet. Certainly, once that investigation is through, we’ll then make a final conclusion as to who will be disciplined and how.”

Here’s one for all the fellas out there, and the gals for that matter: If you made it all the way to high school without burping in class or kicking a bully in the nuts, raise your hand. Go on. Anybody? Not me, that’s for sure.

Kids are kids. Isn’t that punishment enough?