Martha Stewart Starts Domestic War With Gwyneth Paltrow

Kaitlan Collins Contributor
Font Size:

If Martha Stewart learned anything during her five months in prison, it was certainly how to be the most polite and domestic bully to ever live. She’s been feuding with fellow homemaker Gwyneth Paltrow lately, and Stewart just took the argument to a six-page spread, topped with a dab of whipped cream, in the November issue of “Martha Stewart Living.”

Things started when Stewart made the comment that Paltrow should just stick to acting when she was asked about Paltrow’s similar lifestyle publication, Goop.

“She just needs to be quiet. She’s a movie star. If she were confident in her acting, she wouldn’t be trying to be Martha Stewart,” Stewart said.

And then Paltrow said she was psyched Stewart saw her as competition, and hired her former CEO. Now, Stewart is mocking Paltrow’s “conscious uncoupling” (also known as a breakup) from Coldplay’s Chris Martin, with this spread in her magazine about the “conscious coupling” of some good old Thanksgiving pies.

(Photo: Martha Stewart Living)

(Photo: Martha Stewart Living)

It reads:

“Every Thanksgiving table should be blessed with the presence of a long-married pair who bring out the best in each other, are completely enamored despite their differences, and leave every other guest thinking, I’ll have what they’re having. Our holiday pies honor such so there’s a pleasant mix of textures and flavors in every bite. No matter how you slice partnerships, each spotlighting the perfect marriage of crust and filling these six irresistible desserts, there is a whole lot to love.”

Apparently you can’t keep a 73-year-old homemaker down. (RELATED: At Least Gwyneth Paltrow Is Pretty)