Satire

4 Reasons The US Shouldn’t Switch To The Metric System

Alex Griswold Media Reporter

Note: The Daily Caller, like all news outlets, has felt the massive drain in traffic that came with the introduction of Vox Dot Com. Accordingly, we have decided to shift in a more “Voxplainy” direction: using charts and graphics to explain 100 percent true statements, such as the fact that Games of Thrones is secretly all about climate change.

During his recent campaign announcement speech, Democratic presidential candidate Lincoln Chaffee championed the idea of switching the Unites States over to the metric system. Many arguments have been put forward in favor of such a switch, but here are four graphics that demonstrate the problem with Chaffee’s proposal.

1. All the Communist countries that use the metric system.

Commie rats

China, Cuba, North Korea, Laos, and Vietnam are all oppressive Communist dictatorships that use the metric system.

2. All the Communist countries that don’t use the metric system.

worldblank

Huh? That’s weird. There are none. Hmmmmmm…

3. All the countries that don’t use the metric system, but don’t have the bald eagle as an official animal

not quite commie rats

Myanmar and Liberia. Both perfectly pleasant countries with barely any fascist military coups. But neither of their official animals soar through the mountains singing the song of freedom.

4.  All the countries that don’t use the metric system, and DO have the bald eagle as an official animal

USAUSA

Need I say more?

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