PETA Still Waging War On Fun, Now Investigating NFL Star’s Impossibly Cute Pet Monkey

Christian Datoc Senior White House Correspondent
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PETA — everyone’s favorite animal rights group — has launched an investigation into Dallas Cowboys wide receiver Dez Bryant.

More specifically, they’ve begun contacting pertinent authorities, keying them in to the fact that Bryant now has a capuchin monkey as a pet.

Brittany Peet — PETA’s deputy director of captive animal law enforcement — claims that the “baby capuchin was torn away from his mother shortly after birth and needs special care that can now only be provided by wildlife experts,” reports ESPN.

“Monkeys belong in the wild — not in the hands of football players who acquire exotic animals just to make a splash on Instagram,” Peet continued.

For the record, here’s Dez’s monkey, nicknamed Dallas. (VIDEO: Dez Bryant Unleashes NSFW Tirade On Locker Room Reporters)

My new best friend…. Dallas Bryant world #throwupthex

A photo posted by Dez Bryant (@dezbryant) on

The guy looks perfectly happy in my eyes.

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