Boycotting Israel For Dummies

Paul Miller President, Haym Solomon Center
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With nearly a dozen states passing or soon to approve resolutions condemning the anti-Israel Boycott, Divestment and Sanctions movement (BDS), and nations such as Canada, Britain and the United States following suit, our BDS friends need to step up their game or they will soon go the way of the dinosaurs or Pat Buchanan.

The time has come for BDSers to set an example for one another and inspire new adherents to join them in delegitimizing the Jewish state. I’m not saying this will be easy. In fact it will drastically change how you live your life. But don’t you kvetch just yet. Help is online.

Technology geeks-turned-humanitarians Avihai and Dan understand the challenges BDSers face. In an exclusive interview, they explained to me that Israel is part of everyone’s life, and the Jewish state’s contributions to the world through technology, communications and medicine are nearly impossible to avoid. Concerned that anti-Israel advocates were “not actually boycotting Israel, but just being hypocrites,” these 21st century heroes have developed a comprehensive BDS Guide (bdsguide.com), so Israel haters can truly live an Israel-free lifestyle.

“Dan had come to me with the idea for what would become BDS Guide after I had posted on my personal Facebook page about a chapter of Students for Justice in Palestine that had created a website supporting BDS using Wix, which is an Israeli company,” explained Avihai. “We felt it was time that we show the hypocrisy and how they really aren’t boycotting Israel at all. Examples of the movement’s hypocrisy are endless.”

BDS Guide offers a one-stop clearinghouse of sorts, providing the website user with an ongoing list of products, inventions and businesses that in some way embrace Israel or are Israeli born.

If you’re viewing BDS Guide on the Chrome web browser or using the Windows operating system, BDS Guide from the start will help you renounce your life as a hypocrite.

Chrome is a Google service. Google Israel has developed many of Google’s features and services including live search and Adsense. Please uninstall Google Chrome.

Windows is a Microsoft product. Microsoft recently made its third security firm acquisition and has a research and development center in Israel. Please uninstall Windows.

The step-by-step tutorial continues by selecting the “LET’S KEEP GOING” button. Staring you in the face is Facebook and the harsh reality that the social media giant is in bed with Israel.

Did you know that Facebook opened an R&D center in Israel and acquired Israeli mobile tech company Onavo? Yup. Please stop using Facebook immediately!

With well over a billion people on Facebook, this will be very difficult for the BDS movement to adopt. BDS proponents such as Students for Justice in PalestineCode Pink and the Council on American-Islamic Relations use the media platform which has spent hundreds of millions of dollars in the Jewish state for promoting anti-Israel rallies, BDS activities on college campuses, and attacking businesses and artists who work or perform in Israel. Thankfully, there is BDS Guide to help activists rectify this, so they can go back to organizing the old-fashioned way such as landline phones, newspaper ads (physical only) and smoke signals, to denounce the Zionist entity.

BDS Guide goes that extra mile to ensure boycotters don’t corrupt themselves by using Internet search engines Google and Bing. As the website points out, “Google’s search algorithms and live search were developed by Google Israel, and Bing was developed by Microsoft Israel.”

The love and compassion Avihai and Dan show BDSers has no limits. Movement co-founder Omar Barghouti is the Tel Aviv-educated BDS poster child for hypocrisy. Avihai and Dan’s concerns about his identity crisis triggered by his pro-Israel lifestyle have them currently working on a section of the guide that exposes his duplicity cognitive dissonance.

By this point, the anti-Israel soldier most likely will have a massive headache after learning about the life-changes they will need to undergo. BDS Guide reminds you that you can’t take Advil, as well as a seemingly endless list of medicines and treatments for cancer to cholesterol and hemorrhoids to erectile dysfunction that were discovered, manufactured or marketed in Israel.

Are you an online shopper? Want to use Paypal or Amazon? Forget about it. Actually, BDSers can’t even get on the website if they are using a computer with an Intel or AMD processor.

Intel operates five facilities in Israel and has been changing the world from its operations in the Jewish state for over 40 years. AMD has spent millions in Israel, establishing a research and development center nearly five years ago in Ramat Gan.

If you want to access BDS Update via your cellular or smartphone, don’t even bother. The technology, manufacturers and service providers rely so heavily on everything Israel that it’s futile to even bother justifying using your mobile device.

The user-friendly website walks you through the process, so you can be a pure, unadulterated   boycotter. No longer will hypocrisy define your very existence. But as mentioned earlier, this will not be easy – more difficult than giving up milk and honey.

Paul Miller is president and executive director of the news and public policy group Haym Salomon Center. Follow him on twitter @pauliespoint.