‘Game Of Thrones’ Episode Recap: Death and All His Thrones

(Photo: HBO screen grab)

David Oliver Contributor
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All your friends are sick of you saying how bananas “Game of Thrones” is. “How could it possibly get more bananas?” They ask you sheepishly, sarcastically.

Hope they’re ready for your barrage of banana social media posts tonight, wildlings.

Warning: Spoilers ahead.

Game of Thrones logo

(Photo: HBO screen grab)

The episode began with a drastic change in tone as everyone in King’s Landing prepared themselves for Cersei and Loras’s trial; the soft piano music choice is reminiscent of a teen drama. A single bell tolls, reminiscent of Cersei’s (literal) walk of shame. Cersei’s black dress is masculine — promoting a somber yet forbearing aesthetic.

Loras — during Pride month, of all months — admits his crimes before the High Sparrow and others in the Sept, accepts his punishment and says he will devote his life to the Seven. This means abandoning his name, renouncing his lordship, claims on Highgarden, etc. Once that’s done, he gets that gruesome forehead tattoo Lancel sports.

When it’s Cersei’s turn for trial, she’s nowhere to be found (Lancel’s on the case). And Gregor Clegane stops Tommen from leaving his room. But why?

Remember all that bright green wildfire under the city that Tyrion used some of during the Battle of Blackwater? Well, uh, Cersei uses that to blow up the Sept and everyone in it. That’s right: Bye High Sparrow, Margaery, Loras. One of Varys’s “little birds” thwarts Lancel’s attempt to find Cersei by stabbing him. He sees all that wildfire (and the flame set to ignite it) before it all blows, but couldn’t reach it in time.

Cersei drinking wine and staring at the rising clouds of smoke from the Sept shows early signs of promise for this as a very GIF-worthy episode. She then pours said wine on her “shame” nun and sicks Clegane on her, then vengefully taunts “shame” as the woman screams.

But real shame comes in different packages this episode — one of which is prophecy. Tommen doesn’t exactly take the death of his wife well. He removes his crown and goes out of frame. We’re left with a lingering shot of the smoke (uncomfortably long; I thought the show paused), only to have Tommen then jump (!) out of his window, committing suicide. Prophecy fulfilled. Cue Vine of the “Mad Men” theme paired with this scene.

Sam and Gilly remain awkward and head to the Citadel at Oldtown. Sam comes upon a library that screamed “Get you a library that can do both” (i.e. books and a beautiful, massive interior design).

In the North, Davos exposes Melisandre for her part in Shireen’s death. Jon tells her to GTFO and ride south.

Game Of Thrones (Credit: Screenshot/Youtube GameOfThrones)

(Photo: HBO screen grab)

Jon and Sansa have (yet another) touching sibling moment, as she tells him, “Only a fool would trust Littlefinger” while Jon insists, “We need to trust each other.” Understatement on both counts, but yes. And Sansa delivers perhaps the most cringe-worthy piece of dialogue: “Winter is here.”

Ironically, I’m wearing a “Winter is coming” shirt and now I feel very last season, if you will.

Olenna pays a visit to Dorne and verbally, viscerally shuts down the Sand Snakes, as only she can. Ellaria wants to form an alliance with her, and perhaps she’ll partake once she sees her old pal Varys (!) come out of the shadows. The plot — it thickens.

Daario’s lovesick pleas are no match for Daenerys’s cold ambition and Tyrion’s skilled advising. “You’re in the great game now, and the great game’s terrifying,” Tyrion tells her. She names him Hand of the Queen, in the episode’s most touching moment.

It’s fitting, then, to head to the episode’s least touching moment: Walder Frey served food featuring pieces of his dead sons. But who’s behind it all? A faceless girl, none other than Arya Stark herself. She slices Frey’s throat, a seething callback to Catelyn’s murder.

Catelyn might have been proud of that, but she should be prouder of Sansa for resisting Littlefinger’s latest pass and Bran for finally revisiting that old vision from earlier this season. Ding ding ding, fan theory confirmed: Lyanna Stark is Jon Snow’s mother. She asks Ned to take care of him as she succumbs post-childbirth. The cut from the baby to a present-day Jon Snow is maybe too much, but it does drive the plot point home.

Another Lyanna (Mormont) speaks her mind (Lyanna Mormont 2016) and encourages the declaration of Jon Snow as King in the North amid a meeting of the North army. This all happens as Sansa sits by Jon’s side, curiously. The whole season has been a feminist triumph, between Arya, Brienne, Sansa, Margaery and more claiming ground and fighting back. For all Sansa’s work to have Jon king is slightly troublesome. Her locking eyes with Littlefinger suggests a potential power struggle that I am here for.

(Photo: HBO screen grab)

(Photo: HBO screen grab)

Back in King’s Landing, Jamie returns to see Cersei take her spot on the Iron Throne. A triumph for women? Ehh, questionable. She blows everyone up to get to this point — much like the Mad King intended to do to King’s Landing. Tyrion warning Daenerys to not turn into her father is perhaps advice he should have given to her sister; is she the new Mad Queen?

We’re going to find out: Theon, Yara, Daenerys, Tyrion, Varys (back quick from Dorne?), Missandei and Grey Worm set sail for Westeros. The dragons soar and season six comes to a close.

Wow. Have yet to process all these events, though looks like HBO will save some money on its cast when “Game of Thrones” returns. Is there a “supernatural somber” playlist on Spotify?