DC Trawler

Yay, More Pandas

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We don’t really need pandas anymore, because we have computers. Now we can make our own pandas, and they’re infinitely better than the real thing. See?

Isn’t that much more entertaining than some dumb, smelly animal? Isn’t that less futile than trying to rescue a species that doesn’t even care enough to propagate itself? I see no reason to keep bailing them out, but clearly I’m in the vast minority.


The only female giant panda in Britain is believed to be pregnant, Edinburgh Zoo said Thursday…

The zoo’s statement came after the Edinburgh Evening News used the Freedom of Information Act to obtain correspondence between the zoo and Scottish government disclosing that Tian Tian had been artificially inseminated and could give birth as early as this week.

Just imagine trying to artificially inseminate a panda. I’ll never complain about any job I ever have again.