Hell hath no fury like a Donald scorned.
Tuesday afternoon saw the Twitter equivalent of a schoolyard slap-fight between billionaire blusterer Donald Trump and MSNBC host Lawrence O’Donnell.
Although it isn’t clear what prompted the tussle, Trump delivered the first salvo. Below, purely for amusement, is a transcript:
The Donald: “Last year @Lawrence strongly predicted that @TimPawlenty would be the Republican nominee–@Lawrence is a total loser who is killing the MSNBC brand. He is begging me to be on his show. I am his only hope–@oreillyfactor killed him.”
O’Donnell: “@realDonaldTrump What else did I predict? Something about u? Like the exact day u would reveal that u were not running. That was so easy.”
O’Donnell: “@realDonaldTrump I assume you’re still afraid of coming on my show. Don’t worry, we will light your hair any way you want.”
The Donald: “I only go on shows that get ratings, that’s why I do @oreillyfactor, @hannityshow, and @gretawire. Your show @lawrence, like you, is a loser that will soon be off the air. @oreillyfactor killed you at 8PM.”
O’Donnell: “@realDonaldTrump Politeness (to the hosts) prevents me from naming lower rated shows than mine you’ve appeared on.”
The Donald: “@Lawrence There is no such thing— they can’t get much lower than yours.”
O’Donnell: “@realDonaldTrump Have I ever been wrong about you? Please tell me one thing I got wrong about you.”
The Donald: “@Lawrence Yes, great hair, and it’s actually mine.”
O’Donnell: “@realDonaldTrump Never said that’s not your hair. I take this tweet as confirmation from you that I have never been wrong about you. Thanks”
The Donald: “It’s sad with only 57,000 followers on Twitter that you are topping your broadcast. @lawrence”
O’Donnell: @realDonaldTrump I had over million viewers Fri, double @cnn audience, 2nd only to @oreillyfactor who has always been 8pm ratings king.”
The Donald: “Stop calling my office to do your show, I have more important things to do with my time — nobody’s watching you! @lawrence”
As of press time, neither party has challenged the other to meet at the flagpole after school, nor has it been confirmed whose dad could beat up whose in a fight.