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Joe Biden’s U-Haul got stolen, you guys

Jim Treacher Blogger
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No, he’s not moving out of the Naval Observatory. Not for a few more months, anyway. But when the intellect of the Democratic Party gave one of his really great speeches in Detroit yesterday, he was missing a few things. ABC News reports:

A U-Haul truck carrying equipment for Vice President Joe Biden’s campaign event in Detroit Monday was stolen this weekend, ABC News confirmed with United States Secret Service.

Ed Donovan, a spokesman for the USSS, told ABC News the truck carrying equipment was stolen between late Saturday night and early Sunday morning at the Westin Hotel in Detroit. He would not specify what kind of equipment was in the truck.

That’s classified information, but we do know that the truck itself is kind of a grille with a chassis behind it.

Now there’s good news, sort of:

The stolen U-Haul truck holding equipment for one of Vice President Joe Biden’s events was recovered in Detroit today, but some if its contents are missing.

The truck was found outside an apartment near Henry Ford Hospital in Detroit, U.S. Secret Service spokesman Ed Donovan told ABC News. But some of the contents, which they will not describe, were missing from the recovered truck.

Any chairs in there? Because I don’t think they’ll mind missing a few empty chairs. They’re getting pretty tired of hearing about empty chairs.

What is going on with the Secret Service these days, anyhow? First we find out they’re leaving their weapons in airplane bathrooms. Now they can’t even keep an eye on Biden’s U-Haul. Sounds to me like they need somebody to set them straight over there. And I know just the guy to do it…

Well, okay, so maybe that didn’t turn out so well for the other guy. But still, at least they didn’t lose the Vice President’s damn truck. Sheesh.

P.S. Speaking of empty chairs — and isn’t it fun to speak of them? — the DNC sure is worried about having too many. According to Michael Barone, they’ve got the tiniest convention floor anybody has ever seen.

P.P.S. Oh, now people are just taunting him about it…

P.P.P.S. Sheriff Joe explains why we’re better off than we were four years ago:

Whoops. Guess not. Damn you, Global Warming!!

P.P.P.P.S. Turns out the truck was loaded with metal detectors. Good thing he was only going to Detroit, and not someplace dangerous.

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