DC Trawler

Big-Government Liberal Al Franken Thinks Your Kids Can Fend For Themselves

REUTERS/Mark Kauzlarich

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I didn’t watch the first night of the DNC, and I probably won’t watch any of it other than punishing myself with Hillary’s acceptance speech. Same with the RNC. It’s just a time-saving measure. In the age of the Twitters and the interwebs, it takes too damn long to be lied to in real time. So I missed Al Franken and Sarah Silverman embarrassing themselves, but I enjoyed all the heckling.

As the indispensable Twitchy points out, at one point Franken said something that’s making people smirk right back at him:

“Many of you have jobs. Many of you have families. Ignore them. Let me tell you something, kids love it when their parents are not home. They love it. And let me tell you something else, an eight-year-old kid knows how to use a microwave oven. And let me tell you something else, an eight-year-old kid can teach a four-year-old kid to use a microwave oven, it’s scientific fact. Don’t worry about your kids, they will be fine. You have work to do.”

Here’s a representative example of the response:


Here’s something you won’t hear me say very often: Al Franken is right! Kids are smarter and more capable than we give them credit for being. They’ll be okay. The sooner they learn to fend for themselves, the better.

But then, I’m not a big-government lib who wants you to hand over your whole life to me. Why is Al Franken saying stuff like this?

His party’s whole pitch is that they’re going to take care of you, cradle to grave. Remember “Julia”?

Life of Julia

That’s the dream: For your whole life, every need will be fulfilled by the benevolent, ever-present state. All you have to do is submit.

And my fellow Americans, Al Franken wants you to abandon your own Julias (and/or Julians) to help achieve that dream.

Abandon your children… for the children!

Nah. You’re right that we can all take care of ourselves, Sen. Smalley. And that means we don’t need you. Thanks for confirming.