A New Hunt For Bigfoot Is Being Launched. Where Do I Sign Up?

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Andrew Powell Contributor
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It’s times like this I wish I had a private jet — or at least a helicopter.

And that’s because I’m trying to fly to Colorado Springs this weekend after I get done with work Friday, as the 3rd annual Pikes Peak Bigfoot Benefit Hike will be underway this Saturday, Sept. 23.

Not only would I be able to search for the legendary Bigfoot (which is a dream of mine) — I would also be able to do a good deed, as the annual hike is meant to be a fundraiser for Friends of the Peak. The organization is an all-volunteer nonprofit that maintains the trails on Pikes Peak.

The event is an open format, with people having the opportunity to hunt for Sasquatch from 8:30 a.m. to 2:30 p.m along the Mt. Esther/Crowe Gulch trail.

I can picture it now … I’m walking along the trail hunting for Bigfoot, taking glances at college football on my phone.

It honestly sounds like an incredible experience, and there’s also a chance to win prizes too for the first, second and third-place finishers … (*does research, returns to blog minutes later*) … okay, so screw the prizes. Apparently if you see some guy dressed in a monkey suit, you’re supposed to give him a registration stub and blah, blah, blah.

Forget that. If I’m in Pikes Peak, the actual home of Bigfoot, I’m going to look for the real Sasquatch. Not some dude dressed like he wants to be a part of the next installment of “Planet of the Apes.” And what happens if the real Bigfoot shows up and somebody thinks it’s just a costumed individual, and then Sasquatch rips them up and then Friends of the Peak has a lawsuit on their hands? (RELATED: Alleged Bigfoot Caught On Trail Camera In Florida)

… On second thought, I’m just gonna stay home and watch college football from the comfort of my couch.