1.) Rahm’s out. Plouffe’s in? — One way you can tell things are going really well in the White House is that nobody wants to work there anymore. TheDC’s Jon Ward writes, “White House chief of staff Rahm Emanuel will announce his departure Friday, and is likely to run for mayor of Chicago. He will be replaced by senior adviser Pete Rouse, who has been with Obama since his time as a senator. But the most significant change to Obama’s innermost ring of advisers will be the subtraction of Emanuel and the imminent addition of David Plouffe, Obama’s former campaign manager. Plouffe is set to enter the West Wing to replace senior adviser David Axelrod, who will leave in April.” Some rats flee a sinking ship. Other rats happen to be swimming by and say to themselves, “Why not? I’ll just hold my breath!”
2.) Meg Whitman caught in boring, confusing scandal — Okay, so Meg Whitman hired a housekeeper back in 2000, and the housekeeper claimed to be a legal resident and provided the proper documentation and everything. Then Whitman found out the housekeeper was in the country illegally and fired her, but didn’t turn her over to the authorities. Now Gloria Allred is representing the housekeeper and claiming Whitman knew about it back in 2003, instead of 2009 as Whitman claims, because of a letter from the Social Security Administration. The LA Times reports: “Dr. Griff Harsh, Meg Whitman’s husband, just released a statement saying that it may be his handwriting on a 2003 letter that raised the possibility that their housekeeper was undocumented. The statement came hours after Whitman held a news conference at which she insisted neither she nor her husband had seen the letter from the Social Security Administration, and suggested that the housekeeper had intercepted it.” So Whitman and her husband may or may not have received a letter, or may or may not remember receiving it, 7 years ago. Stay tuned!
3.) Live by the tweet, die by the tweet — You sure can squeeze a lot of arrogance into 140 characters. CNN reports: “Alaska GOP Senate nominee Joe Miller’s campaign has deleted at least four tweets published on its official Twitter account Wednesday night that imply Miller feels his election is all but certain. ‘Think I’ll do some house hunting while I’m in DC,’ one of them read. And then: ‘Guess I should pick out some office furniture, as well…’ Plus: ‘Then there’s matter of a name plaque for the door.'” Gettin’ pretty cocky there, Joe! When people talk about a political candidate measuring the drapes in his office already, they’re not being nice.
4.) Obama opens for B.o.B — All American presidents eventually need to lower their expectations, but this is ridiculous. Associated Press: “Grasping for the electric energy that propelled him to the White House, President Barack Obama whipped up young supporters at a rally Thursday night, where the boisterous crowd tried to shout down any talk of an ‘enthusiasm gap’ among Democrats… The DNC had enlisted hip hop artist B.o.B to perform, and the crowd also heard from Obama’s 2008 campaign manager, David Plouffe, on the importance of the youth vote to the November midterm elections, which are expected to be brutal for the Democrats.” Wow, B.o.B AND Plouffe? Everybody’s gonna vote for the Dems now!
5.) Rush Limbaugh appears on Family Guy for some reason If you like Rush Limbaugh and you like Family Guy, chances are you aren’t reading this. Nonetheless, Limbaugh is lending his voice to the show this Sunday night, in which he will portray his favorite person. Synopsis: “The premise of the episode is that Limbaugh comes to the town of Quahog for a book signing and Brian, the family dog, heads down to the signing to let the host have a piece of his liberal mind. In the process, Limbaugh convinces Brian to become a conservative. The two proceed to pal around together and eventually Brian becomes too right-wing–even for Limbaugh.” Wow, that’s super-right-wing! See, because Limbaugh is really right-wing. He’s a right-winger. Get it? Family Guy is funny.
6.) The Senate finally starts tackling the big issues — Don’t you hate it when TV commercials are way louder than the actual shows? And you have to press buttons on a handheld piece of plastic to lower the volume? It probably says somewhere in the Constitution that those mean TV people aren’t allowed to do that to you. Good news, the Senate is on the case! AP: “Legislation to turn down the volume on those loud TV commercials that send couch potatoes diving for their remote controls looks like it’ll soon become law. The Senate unanimously passed a bill late Wednesday to require television stations and cable companies to keep commercials at the same volume as the programs they interrupt. The House has passed similar legislation.” All is forgiven, Congress. All is forgiven.