1.) Newtosaurus Sex — As you surely have learned by now, Newt Gingrich operates on a different plane than most ordinary mortals. His ideas are bigger by at least a factor of 3 — or so he would argue. Which is why it comes as no surprise that he was thinking about space sex before anyone else. TheDC’s Will Rahn reports:
“However, by 1996 Gingrich thought that the space program had lost its ‘spirit of adventure’ because of the pernicious influence of government bureaucrats. If they were to get out of the way and allow private space exploration, he wrote, private entrepreneurs could be given free reign to explore the heavens at a fraction of the cost. We could also have sex in space. ‘I believe that space tourism will be a common fact of life during the adulthood of children born this year, that honeymoons in space will be the vogue by 2020,’ Gingrich wrote toward the end of the chapter. ‘Imagine weightlessness and its effects and you will understand some of the attractions.’”
Also on Newt’s agenda in the 1990s was trying to create a real-life Jurassic Park. I don’t know how successful a Newt Gingrich administration would be, but I think we can objectively say it would be outrageously awesome to cover.
2.) Sorry Senor 🙁 — House oversight committee chairman Darrell Issa said that Attorney General Eric Holder ought to apologize to the Mexican government, among other people and entities, for Operation Fast and Furious. TheDC’s Matthew Boyle reports:
“‘Justice has blood on their hands,’ Issa said Wednesday during an exclusive interview with TheDC, referring to the U.S. Department of Justice. ‘The attorney general, as the head of Justice, has to explain that to the families of survivors,’ Issa said. ‘Yes, he should find a way to make it very clear to our neighbors to the south — at least to the government and at least publicly — that there needs to be deep regret for what happened and there needs to be reassurances that it never happens again.’”
3.) Mexican Mitt? — You’ll be shocked to know that should Mitt Romney become the 45th president of these United States, he won’t consider himself the country’s first Hispanic president. We know that because he was asked that question at a presidential forum in Miami Wednesday. This is not a joke. TheDC’s Jamie Weinstein (ME!) reports:
“Mitt Romney said Wednesday at a ‘Meet the Candidates’ forum sponsored by Univision that though his father was born in Mexico, he didn’t consider himself Mexican-American — but he wouldn’t mind if Floridians thought he was when they cast their ballot in the GOP primary Tuesday. ‘I would love to be able to convince people of that, particularly in a Florida primary,’ Romney said when the forum’s moderator Jorge Ramos asked if the former Massachusetts governor would consider himself the first Hispanic president if elected, considering that his father was born south of the border … ‘I don’t think people would think I was being honest with them if I told them I was Mexican-American but I would appreciate if you would get that word out,’ Romney said.”
He did promise, however, to serve Coronas at the White House on Cinco de Mayo. #KIDDING!
4.) What happens if a presidential candidate releases their tax returns but nobody cares? — Meet Fred Karger, who evidently is running for president. Karger is desperately trying to garner some attention and his latest stunt to do so centers on knocking Mitt Romney by pledging to release the last 12 years of his tax returns. TheDC’s Alex Pappas performs charity by reporting:
“Longshot Republican presidential candidate Fred Karger said he will release 12 years worth of his tax returns in front of the George Romney Institute for Law and Public Policy in Michigan on Thursday. Karger’s stunt is apparently an effort to prod former Massachusetts Gov. Mitt Romney, who released two years of his tax returns this week but is still facing calls to release older tax filings too. Romney’s father released 12 years of his tax returns when he ran for president in 1968.”
Can you imagine running for president and being less relevant than Mike Gravel? Probably not — but Fred Karger can!
5.) Poll of the Day — Pew Research Center: 54 percent of Americans say it is more important to “take [a] firm stand” against Iran over its nuclear program while 39 percent say it is more important to “avoid military conflict.” Of just Republicans, 72 percent say it is more important to “take [a] firm stand” against the Islamic Republic compared to 22 percent who say it is more important to “avoid military conflict.”
6.) Birthdays! — Gen. Douglas MacArthur turns 132; the late, not-so-great Romanian dictator Nicolae Ceauşescu turns 94; “The Ellen Degeneres Show” host Ellen Degeneres turns 56; hockey legend Wayne Gretzky turns 51.