Want to blow through the poisonous miasma of Russian Collusion to find out what was really going on in the American political system in the last year or two or twenty? Whatever you do, don’t ask Congress to investigate — not even to ask a few lame questions in five-minute increments. What’s the point? Congress is the most expensive dog-and-pony-show on earth. We, the Taxpayers, pay through the nose for these guys and gals to go to “work” every day: by my calculation (635 X $174,000), Capitol Hill costs Americans at least $110,490,000 annually just for the privilege of being “represented.” The only thing all that power and money coursing through those snaking hallways buys for us is power and money coursing through those snaking hallways. If you’re looking for representative government, it’s not to be found.

If you’re looking for fealty to the Swamp, however, you’ve come to the right place.

Thus, our elected representatives will keep enforcing the Establishment “narrative,” which thrives on confusion and cover-up. And why not? Republican or Democrat, they are the Establishment.

Here are their core talking points — which, in the tradition of good old fashioned cover-ups, are mainly non-talking points.

1. The “Russians hacked” the DNC — although there is nada, zip, zero verifiable, official evidence.
2. The unsolved murder of DNC new voter data director Seth Rich, whom Wikileaks Julian Assange has strongly indicated was a Wikileaks source, is a “botched robbery” — if, after what happened to Sean Hannity, the topic ever comes up again.
3. The Obama administration’s Stasi-like spying on Americans (rather more delicately known as “unmasking”) including Gen. Flynn and twenty million other Americans, according to massive documentation alleged to have been copied by a NSA/CIA whistleblower, is a non-event.
4. The provenance and dissemination of the so-called “Russian dossier,” produced by former journalist Glenn Simpson of GPS Fusion at the behest of #NeverTrump Republicans then pro-Hillary Democrats, with a $50,000 bonus offered by the FBI, are of no interest to the American people, either.

Nor is the fact that Simpson, among others, is accused in a complaint filed last summer with the Justice Department by Bill Browder of failing to have registered as a foreign agent of Russia over his company’s role in lobbying against the Magnitsky Act. According to Browder’s complaint, this anti-Magnitsky lobbying program was spearheaded by Natalia Veselnitskaya — the same exact Russian lawyer Donald Trump Jr. wishes he’d never heard of.

Whatever you do, though, if you’re in the US Congress, don’t find out anything more about any of it, and especially not if any of it links together. Sure, “invite” the Susan Rices and Glenn Simpsons to testify about “unmasking” and “dirty dossiers” respectively. Heck, invite the DNC contractors who i.d.’d the “Russian hack” of the DNC servers in the first place (not that the DNC ever permitted the FBI to have a look at the servers to make sure). When these witnesses decline to appear (as these all have), don’t, whatever you do, subpoena them. They might show up. They might say something that would undermine the Big Lies being set in sound bytes for posterity’s history books. We can’t have that. The Swamp wouldn’t like it.

As for witnesses who want to come before Congress’s committees and swear to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth about their highly relevant experiences, such as Carter Page, don’t worry: block them. Or, in Bill Browder’s case, postpone them.

Always remember: In Washington, the way to “get to the bottom of things” is not to ask questions, but to keep diving. There are shiny rewards below.