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Man Allegedly Robs A Bank To Impress Taylor Swift, It Goes As Well As You’d Expect

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David Hookstead Smoke Room Editor-in-Chief
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One man had to learn the hard way that allegedly robbing a bank to impress Taylor Swift is not a smart idea.

Bruce Rowley was taken into the custody after allegedly robbing a Connecticut bank, and the details are absurd. TMZ reported the following:

Bruce Rowley was arrested last week in Ansonia, CT after cops say he confessed to robbing a bank and then driving to Taylor’s house and throwing some of the money that he stole over her fence, thinking that would win her over … this according to a police report obtained by TMZ.

According to the police report … Rowley repeatedly told cops he had a crush on Taylor and that he planned on donating some of the money he stole from the bank to Ansonia PD … believing that would impress her. 

Rowley was booked for robbery in the second degree and larceny in the fourth degree. He’s being held on bail.

Look, things have gone terribly wrong for you if you’re robbing banks to impress Taylor Swift. I’m as big a fan of Swift, aka America’s sweetheart, but the only thing I’m ever doing for her is buying a ticket to a concert. Hell, she might have written songs about me, and I’m still not going to rob a bank.

What was this guy’s plan? He throws some money over a fence and impress Taylor Swift? Is he aware that Taylor Swift is one of the richest people on the planet? She’d look at the money in a bank and probably laugh at it. She could burn up a vault of money without even noticing it was gone. I don’t think Rowley’s little tribute was going to do much when it came to winning her heart over. At the same time, he did admit he had a crush on her, and I’m pretty sure you’re not legally responsible for any of your actions while you have a crush on a woman. That’s law school day one stuff.

On a more serious note, I really hope Swift has a tight security detail. There are a lot of crazy people on this planet, and they really like to go for famous people. I wouldn’t roll with anything less than three armored SUVs and 12 men at all time. It’s just not worth the risk.

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