Donald Trump can easily take back the White House, but he’ll have to make a big, big choice.
So many rumors have swirled about MAGA world over Trump’s potential running mate. Should it be the Arizona firebrand Kari Lake, or the spitfire of South Dakota, Kristi Noem? What about in Congress… MTG, Elise Stefanik, J.D. Vance? Or how about Trump’s former nemesis, Ron DeSantis? Although biased toward the Daily Caller and its legendary co-founder, this columnist wouldn’t mind seeing a Trump/Tucker ticket. Heck, Trump/Daly.
Regardless, the rumors need to stop, because it’s becoming abundantly clear Trump can only make one choice if he wants to secure a landslide victory over the Disney ride animatronic puppet formerly known as Joe Biden.
The choice, though, is doubly daring. Emphasis on the d’s.
America doesn’t need another beta career politician to follow around Trump on a short leash like Mike Pence, nor does America need a grossly incompetent diversity hire to cackle on command in between rotting word salads.
No, this country needs someone popular, beautiful, young, talented, smart, someone who understands the needs of rural MAGA voters, but also can appeal to city-dwelling citizens, even those residing in the most liberal of enclaves: Hollywood.
Yes, Trump’s best VP pick grew up in Spokane, Washington, the boonies. Her parents are MAGA-adjacent. She is also the biggest star to emerge from Hollywood since Marilyn Monroe.
And perhaps her most redeeming quality — not her overall acting chops, not her bubbly personality, not her ability to navigate the cesspool that is Hollywood without sacrificing her values to the casting couch, not her desire to have a family like a normal person, not her beauty or her, erm, cup size — but simply that she is pure America. She embodies the vibe of America, the kick-ass white, red, and blue that we all grew up with but so rarely see anymore in 2024.
She is ice-cold beer on a Friday night (not Bud Light though, more like a pint of Miller Lite). She’s the Talladega Speedway and Jeff Gordon and hitting 200 mph while he tears through the checkered flag. She’s the sound a hellfire missile makes when it lands on a terrorist’s head. (RELATED: Sorry Haters: Hot Women Playing Sports Is Pure America)
Pure America. Not red, not blue. Just, America.
Which is why she will deliver Trump a yuge victory in November — should Trump pull the trigger.
Her name is …
[For a more intellectual take on Sydney Sweeney’s SNL appearance, read Gage Klipper’s piece, SNL Accidentally Proves Conservatives Right About Everything]
BEVERLY HILLS, CALIFORNIA – AUGUST 13: Sydney Sweeney attends The 2nd Annual HCA TV Awards: Broadcast & Cable at The Beverly Hilton on August 13, 2022 in Beverly Hills, California. (Photo by Kevin Winter/Getty Images)
SANTA MONICA, CALIFORNIA – JUNE 05: Sydney Sweeney attends the 2022 MTV Movie & TV Awards at Barker Hangar on June 05, 2022 in Santa Monica, California. (Photo by Rich Polk/Getty Images for MTV)
BEVERLY HILLS, CALIFORNIA – MARCH 27: Sydney Sweeney as David Yurman Celebrates The Vanity Fair Oscar Party at The Wallis Annenberg Center on March 27, 2022 in Beverly Hills, California. (Photo by Phillip Faraone/Getty Images for Vanity Fair)
SANTA MONICA, CALIFORNIA – FEBRUARY 18: Sydney Sweeney attends the 2024 People’s Choice Awards at Barker Hangar on February 18, 2024 in Santa Monica, California. (Photo by Monica Schipper/Getty Images)
NEW YORK, NEW YORK – MAY 01: Sydney Sweeney attends The 2023 Met Gala Celebrating “Karl Lagerfeld: A Line Of Beauty” at The Metropolitan Museum of Art on May 01, 2023 in New York City. (Photo by Theo Wargo/Getty Images for Karl Lagerfeld)
LOS ANGELES, CALIFORNIA – OCTOBER 17: Sydney Sweeney attends ELLE’s 29th Annual Women in Hollywood celebration presented by Ralph Lauren, Amyris and Lexus at Getty Center on October 17, 2022 in Los Angeles, California. (Photo by Amy Sussman/Getty Images for ELLE)
[For a more intellectual take on Sydney Sweeney’s SNL appearance, read Gage Klipper’s piece, SNL Accidentally Proves Conservatives Right About Everything]