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Rogue Puppet Challenges Students To Snuggle Joe Biden For World Peace

The Daily Caller

Gage Klipper Commentary & Analysis Writer
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A peculiar blue puppet named Edgar has recently been spotted on the George Washington University campus, and he had one very strange question for students: “Would you snuggle Joe Biden for world peace?”

Check out the hilarious interviews below in the world premiere of the Daily Caller’s “Ask America with Edgar.”

Some students were enthusiastic about Edgar’s indecent proposal. One even offered to give President Biden a “pectoral massage.” That left us wondering: does the president even lift, bro?

Others balked as Edgar probed further. America’s brightest young minds jumped right to logistics, expressing concern over whether they’d “be the little spoon or the big spoon.” Some recoiled at Edgar’s suggestion that Joe Biden’s “gnarled talons” might “stroke their instep” in the middle of the night.

Still, some were just in it for the “cheap thrills.”

Overall, Edgar learned that GWU is a campus “full of whores” — and it looks like Grandpa Joe’s still got it. We hope these students are ready for some moderate to heavy sniffing. Don’t worry, no penetration!

Upon being contacted, Edgar the Puppet implored the Daily Caller to ask readers to like and subscribe to his new YouTube channel, “Ask America with Edgar,” lest he have to “go back to working the pole.”