Chris Rock: Barack Obama ‘a white president you can trust’

Jeff Poor Media Reporter
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On Jimmy Kimmel’s ABC show on Friday, comedian Chris Rock said many of President Barack Obama’s characteristics match those generally associated with whites.

“Hi, I’m Chris Rock with a special message for white people,” Rock said. “In times like these, you need a white president you can trust. And that white president’s name is Barack Obama. Let’s take a look at the facts — for the first two years of his life, Barack Obama was known as ‘Barry,’ which is the third-whitest name on earth, right after Cody and Jeff.  And these are the white people who raised Barry — Madelyn and Stanley Dunham. They are so white they have to wear sunglasses because they are hurting each other’s eyes.”

Rock alluded to Obama’s time as community organizer and some of the president’s hobbies.

“After college, Barry went into black neighborhoods in Chicago to try to organize people,” Rock continued. “How white is that? Black people don’t go into black communities. We don’t have to. We’re already there. Look at him — playing golf, body surfing, wearing mom jeans, dancing with Ellen. Barack Obama supports gay marriage. Most black men don’t even support straight marriage. President Obama has a dog. But is it a pit bull? Is it a Rottweiler? No. it’s a Portuguese water dog. And he named him Bo, after one of the Dukes of Hazard. And let’s not forget, Barack Obama is whiter than Snooki, the tanning mom and Tara Reid.”

“Even Mitt Romney is blacker than Obama,” Rock continued. “This is Obama’s family. And these are the Romneys. Look at that — kids, cousins, aunts, uncles. Mitt Romney’s family has more people in it than a Tyler Perry movie.”

“If you want a white president, I got a polo wearing, Hawaii-living, home beer-brewing, league bowling guy for you — Barry Obama, he’s juuuuuuuust white,” Rock added.

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Jeff Poor