Well, well, well, aren’t we a handsome dynamo of a graduation class 2015. On behalf of workin’ hard, playin’ hard, productive Americans everywhere, we salute you and congratulate you all on a job well done, making it through all those trying years of painstaking, arduous schooling. We welcome you all to the unlimited American Dream production zone where your pursuit of happiness and success is now in your hands and your hands alone.

I never went to college because I was too busy learning stuff. As I take a rare break from my ferocious rhythm and blues Rock-N-Roll safari, I am relaxing a bit at the tender age of 66.5 glowing years of my nonstop American Dream perfection because I earned it. You can earn your own too if you remain honest to yourself, reasonably tuned into your surroundings, maintain a superior level of awareness, and respect your sacred temple (body) mind, heart, spirit and soul.

Here are a few pragmatic, real world pointers from the old Motor City Madman guitarboy from the not so mean streets of Detroit. I grew up and made it just fine back when it was a real American city, the loud and proud epicenter of killer soul music, neighborliness, goodwill, decency and the most revered work ethic on earth.

I will not waste your precious time with any opinions, but rather share with you the hard, cold truth of being independent, healthy, happy and successful.

1. Life is not fair. Get used to it.
2. Social justice is a commie scam. Read the drivel of Saul Alinsky and fight it with all you’ve got.
3. Nobody owes you jacksquat. You will either earn your own way, or feel like a helpless leech. There is no middle ground.
4. Economic equality is for sheep. If you really believe we are all equal in our capabilities you will go nowhere.
5. The minimum wage is for minimum wage earners. If you believe you are worth more, go get it. Show by your productivity and professionalism that you are better than minimum. Upgrade awaits upgraders.
6. The government cannot create jobs for you. You must create your own worth by proving yourself to be a gungho benefit for your employer. If you think you can do better, by all means, do better.
7. Partying should not include dangerous or foolish behavior. Clean and sober always provides the most memorable parties without the danger of puking, stumbling, making an ass of yourself or passing out and dying.
8. Peer pressure is for sheep. Stand up for what you believe in.
9. The whole world sucks, but America still sucks less. Learn your history and be the best we the people participant that you can be.
10. Don’t fall for the curse of political correctness. Feeling good is not as important as doing good.
11. Posture and hygiene matters. Carry yourself with dignity and treat others as you would have them treat you.
12. Tell me who you go with and I will tell you what you are. Avoid losers for they will drag you down.
13. Sometimes you give the world the best you got and you get kicked in the teeth. Give the world the best you got anyway.

If any of this confuses anyone, call 1-800-NUMBNUT and you will will get a recording of someone mumbling incoherently. Hang up immediately and re-read The Big Nuge 13. Study them till you live them.

The only thing that truly holds anyone back is themselves. Don’t hold back. Carpe” diem like you mean it and have the time of your lives. God bless and Godspeed my American BloodBrothers! The ball is now in your court. Hit it square, hit it often, hit it hard and hit it smart!