The Mirror

Ted Cruz’s College Roommate Geni-tells All

REUTERS/Mike Segar

Betsy Rothstein Gossip blogger
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Beat this.

Sen. Ted Cruz, the evangelical, family values presidential candidate, is having his masturbatory skills called into question Wednesday by an old college roommate from Princeton who is making his life hell on Twitter.

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The backstory here is that while he was Texas solicitor general between 2003 and 2008, Cruz defended a ban on dildos. In short, the jerkoff defended a law that would criminalize the sale of dildos.

Mother Jones‘s David Corn details the minutia of the anti-dildo law and Cruz’s involvement in it. As noted in the story, when sex shops tried to fight the law, Cruz’s legal time filed this: “The Texas Penal Code prohibits the advertisement and sale of dildos, artificial vaginas, and other obscene devices” but does not ‘forbid the private use of such devices.'”

Headlines left on the cutting room floor:

Ted Cruz’s roommate says he was a first class jerkoff

College Roommate: Ted Cruz Really Is A Masterdebater 

Ted Cruz’s roommate gives him a spanking 

Cruz beat a lot more than political opponents when he was in college

Cruz overcame a lot