For those of you who don’t know care, New York Fashion Week is going on.
New York Fashion Week is one of those special times of the year. It brings everyone together to remember how out of touch and irrelevant the people who participate in it really are.
But being “artists” and “alternative” and all, NYFW participants are largely unaware that they’re a spectacle. And that’s what I’m here for.
Let’s take a look at the most disturbing looks this year’s fashion week has brought us.
Wowza. There it is. Right outta the gate. In case you missed it, her corset says “Send Nudes.”
But that could just be an isolated fashion blunder, right? Wrong.
I present to you the man in sequin pants:
Just so we’re all clear, that is a man. In rose gold sequin culottes. Paired with a safari hat. And what seems to be a junkyard chain draped around his neck.
Next. I’m gonna let this one speak for itself:
And because nothing says style like wrapping caution tape around your neck:
Let’s turn up the heat a little:
So we’re all aware, two of the three people pictured above are men.
To be fair…did anybody really expect Nicki Minaj to act normal during fashion week?
Bummer. I missed the memo that it’s now cool to look like you just raided your flamboyant 90-year-old aerobic instructor’s attic.
Ok so technically this was last year’s look for Troy Solomon, who has over 36,000 Instagram followers, but he didn’t disappoint this year. He wore a silver dress.
But I hold one very special look close to my heart. This man proves that he gets the idea of fashion but is still a man of the people, a la his accessory choice:
Thank you, New York Fashion Week. Please never change. I’ll never have to buy a zoo ticket again.
