America’s Jackets For The Olympics Are Awesome

(Photo by Alain Grosclaude/Agence Zoom/Getty Images)

David Hookstead Sports And Entertainment Editor
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The winter jackets American athletes will be wearing at the 2018 winter Olympics are awesome.

ESPN’s Darren Rovell tweeted out a picture of the jackets and captioned it: “Ralph Lauren’s jacket that US athletes will wear for 2018 Olympics Opening Ceremony can heat up, controlled in three settings by cell phone of athletes.”

When did these get invented? I absolutely need a jacket that I can control from my phone. That’s the America our founding fathers envisioned when they overthrew the British. We’re not only going to clean house with gold medals, but we’re also apparently going to have the coolest jackets ever invented.

Should the other countries even bother showing up? This is going to be a bloodbath in South Korea when our group rolls in. It’s going to be ugly, but at least we’ll be looking good while destroying everybody.

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