Americans are expected to spend a ton of money on beer and fireworks for the 4th of July.
According to WalletHub, more than $1 billion will be spent on fireworks and beer for the upcoming celebration. More than $800 million is expected to be spent on beef and the spending on wine is expected to go north of $560 million. (SLIDESHOW: These Are The Hottest Women On Instagram)
I sure do love this country. Only in America can we drop over $1 billion on beer and then turn around to drop the GDP of a small country on fireworks.
It’s almost like we’re going out of our way to dunk on all the other countries in the world, and I’m here for it. After all, if you beat the British and are back-to-back World War champs, then I think you deserve to spend as much money as you want on beer and fireworks.
We’d almost be insulting our Founding Fathers if we didn’t drink some beers and then blow stuff up.
We didn’t beat the redcoats to then take it easy on the 4th of July a few hundred years later. We fought the tyranny of the British so that we, as free Americans, could set off massive fireworks as we shotgun beers.
Anybody who disagrees is probably straight out of the Soviet Union.
Don’t be ashamed of the fact Americans are spending over $3 billion on beer, fireworks, beef and wine combined.
It’s just another reminder we’re better than everybody else, and we don’t mind showing them.
Check back next week for my official guide on how to properly celebrate the holiday. It’s going to be required reading for anybody who loves America.