The Dark Lord Returns: Olbermann Back On Twitter 24 Hours After He Quit ‘Antisemitic’ Platform

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Robert McGreevy Contributor
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He’s back. 

In an incredible, wildly unpredictable event (kidding, I predicted it just this morning), Keith Olbermann has returned to Twitter after making a grand proclamation that he’d stop posting on the platform. 

Citing the apparently “antisemitic” Elon Musk’s flirtation with the Pizzagate conspiracy, Olbermann walked out in disgust, claiming, “I won’t be posting here anymore,” shortly after 1 p.m. Tuesday afternoon. But by 11 a.m. Wednesday morning the dark lord had returned, unable to resist for even one moment the opportunity to suck all of the air out of the room.

This particular time the hall-of-fame-level liberal bloviator just had to shoot a response to Republican Colorado Rep. Lauren Boebert and her farewell message to him.

“Hey, Lauren Boebert,” he tweeted at the Congresswoman. “Somebody sent me your tweet and when I got back on here I found out Elon Musk deleted his endorsement of Pizzagate as I wanted So I’m back! Thanks for giving this story such a happy ending!” he jested, referring to the infamous incident involving Rep. Boebert where she allegedly engaged in inappropriate touching with a date at a showing of “Beetlejuice The Musical.”

“Get a grip on yourself,” he continued, “or some random stranger in the theater.” Obviously extremely proud of himself for the quip, he repeated it in another tweet and pinned it to his profile, while also making the same joke in his Twitter bio, because it was just that funny. (RELATED: ESPN Tells Keith Olbermann To Stop Making ‘Personal Attacks’ After Tweet About Hunter)

“Also, I’m sorry you can’t read but I never said I was leaving Twitter,” the thrice-fired anchor explained. “I wrote I was no longer posting new material here except for dogs in need. I never said anything about replies. Especially not to half-witted congresswomen who can’t…handle themselves in public.”

Boom! Another zinger!

Seriously though it’s hilarious how much this guy loves the sound of his own voice. After making four back-to-back hand job jokes, he took up the important work of railing against former President Donald Trump (because there’s obviously not enough people on Twitter to do that) and then retweeted something about the Affordable Care Act.

A true hero.

If the rest of you cowards don’t have the stones to say it I will. We want Keith Olbermann on that wall … we NEED Keith Olbermann on that wall.