It’s a sad day for America when we have to rely on the biggest nerds in the country to tell us the obvious.

Goldman Sachs bean counters released a report predicting that U.S. GDP could grow by 1% if 60 million Americans started taking weight loss drugs like Ozempic by 2028.

Forget about Big Pharma champing at the bit for such a major cash grab (they are). Set aside whether these new wonder drugs are safe (they aren’t). Did we really need this report to prove that fat people are unhealthy, and more likely to die early and be unproductive? On the other hand, in the age of Lizzo and “Big is Beautiful” campaigns gracing the cover of fashion magazines, maybe we really do need some reminding.

So for anyone who still doesn’t get it: fat people are bad for the American economy. I love freedom as much as the next red-blooded American; don’t let any short-stack mayor take away your Big Gulp. But we need to stop deluding ourselves into thinking that being morbidly obese is good for you, let alone beautiful. Trust me, not even Lizzo wants to look like Lizzo. And if Ozempic gives us a little nudge in the right direction, well … chronic diarrhea can’t be worse than heart failure at 45.

If there’s one thing both parties can agree on, it’s that they’ll whore themselves out to anyone and anything for an extra point of GDP growth. I’m no fan of socialized medicine, but if the federal government wants to drop some Walmart-scootering fatties with Ozempic blow-darts, maybe it’s not such a bad thing.