The World DanceSport Federation (WDSF) issued the sport’s world number one female ranking Monday to Rachel Gunn, the Australian breakdancer who went viral for her laughable Paris Olympics performance in August.
Gunn, who goes by the nickname B-Girl Raygun, astoundingly received zero points across three Olympic matchups during the Summer Olympics in France, losing every matchup by a score of 18-0.
Not only did she receive zero points, our girl Raygun became an absolute laughing stock for her herky-jerky, awkward, looking-like-a-baby-giraffe-trying-to-squeeze-itself-through-a-wire-fence performance.
Missed this other segment of the Australian breakdancer:
she looks like Jeff Goldblum’s The Fly crawling on the verge of dying before begging to be shot on the head(music has been edited) pic.twitter.com/ZGBCfCNC40
— Tancredi Palmeri (@tancredipalmeri) August 14, 2024
The legendarily awful routine prompted a viral response, including a spoof from “Saturday Night Live” alums Jimmy Fallon and Rachel Dratch.
Yet, despite her cringe-inducing routine, the World DanceSport Federation ranked her the best in the world. THE BEST. IN THE WORLD. Imagine if the world number one golf player, Scottie Scheffler, went out in the Olympics and produced a stinker. He didn’t. He’s the best, and so he won gold. As it should be.
Raygun, meanwhile, was so bad that the judges took a page from the classic Adam Sandler flick “Billy Madison,” awarding her no points. May God have mercy on her soul.
Despite being panned by judges and critics alike, Raygun remained defiant, explaining to the world that her performance was ill-received because people just didn’t understand her style.
Raygunites took to the internet to defend their queen, echoing her own explanation to justify her public humiliation.
“It’s totally understandable that you all wouldn’t be able to see the subtle details in the form and original shapes she makes when dancing,” one YouTube commenter, DyzeeDiaries, said on a video of Raygun dancing.
“You also wouldn’t be able to understand the footwork patterns she makes into solid confident shapes while performed on beat,” the commenter continued. “Perhaps it could be our fault for not being able to properly educate the audience through some standard or objective criteria which is something we can work on for the future. The reason why the large majority of Breakers are supporting Raygun is because we understand the nuances of the dance, artform and culture, and we certainly shouldn’t expect non-Breakers to get it.”
See, dumby? She doesn’t suck. You’re just not good at watching things. Don’t be a bigot. Accept my arbitrary and ill-defined criteria for evaluating the age-old artform of dance or be casted as an ignorant fool forever! (RELATED: ‘It Is Just Unfair’: 2-Time Gold Medalist Reacts To ‘Scary’ Olympic Boxing Match Between Biological Male And Woman)
I’m not buying it. A four-minute video showing Raygun’s competition, WDSF’s number two-ranked dancer B-Girl Riko, shows she’s a vastly more impressive athlete and artist than Gunn.
I don’t have to be a breakdancing expert to tell you that one of these cats can move and the other turkey just can’t jive. Riko’s motions are fluid, impressive and could hardly be executed by the layman.
Raygun’s, on the other hand, are pedestrian at best. There is absolutely nothing she did at the Olympics that any average Joe or Jill couldn’t do with 8 minutes of prep time. Don’t believe me? Watch Raygun’s performance at her 2023 Olympic qualifier and tell me she’s better.
Even the judges who sent her to Paris knew she was going to get destroyed.
“All us judges talked about how she was going to get smashed, absolutely smashed [at the Olympics] … She knew it was going to be rough, so it’s actually courageous of her,” Te Hiiritanga Wepiha, a judge on the Oceania qualifying panel, said, according to the BBC.
She’s terrible. I know it. You know it. Her own judges know it. And yet WDSF is telling us she’s the best in the world. This is straight out of the classic tale “The Emperor’s New Clothes.”
Believe not what your eyes see and your ears hear. Your senses cannot be trusted. We know best, we’ll tell you what’s right. The emperor isn’t naked and you’re a fool if you think he is. Joe Biden is fine, better than ever actually. Men can compete in women’s boxing. Rachel Gunn is the best dancer ever!
Give me a break.
