Spike that football, Dogeater-in-Chief. Spike it as hard as you can.
White House officials are using optimistic and assertive language to frame their unconditional withdrawal from the Afghanistan war as a positive achievement, amid a continued offensive by the Taliban and their ideological soulmates in al-Qaida.
“At the end of 2014, the Afghans will be fully responsible for the security of their country” once 88,000 U.S. combat forces return home from the war-torn country, President Barack Obama said in a May 1 prime-time speech from Bagram air base in Afghanistan.
“We must finish the job we started in Afghanistan, and end this war responsibly,” Obama said, even though the U.S. withdrawal will help al-Qaida and the Taliban continue attacking Afghan government and villages.
Well, yeah, but other than that.
And why was Obama in Afghanistan? To remind everybody that one year ago today, he climbed through Osama Bin Laden’s window with a knife between his teeth and took the bastard out personally. Don’t believe me? Just ask Slate.com:
Hey, Obama wasn’t about to leave the job to the military. After all:
And now look at these guys, trying to hog all the credit for Obama’s unprecedented feat of bravery:
How dare they besmirch His Highness? Who do they think they are, anyway?
The sun only rose this morning so Obama wouldn’t stub his toe on his way to the bathroom. Period.