Quote of the Day:
“My mom called just to frantically warn me that keeping a cellphone in your front pocket kills sperm. How’s your day going?”
— Matt Vasilogambros, writer, The Pew Trusts’ Stateline.
NYT culture writer says coffee tastes like garbage
“Look I don’t want to pile on Howard Schultz, but part of the problem here is that coffee, generally speaking, is terrible. It tastes terrible. It tastes like burnt garbage. How did this terrible product become worth billions? …Don’t even get me STARTED on coffee ice cream. Ugh. One addendum to my previous statement: tiramisu is amazing. top tier dessert. and it’s coffee related.” —Sopan Deb, NYT.
Juanita Broaddrick cracks on Geraldo Rivera for his mustache
“Good heavens!! @GeraldoRivera looks ridiculous with his hair and mustache dyed black….. he looks as fake as his rhetoric.” — Juanita Broaddrick, who claims former President Bill Clinton sexually assaulted her in 1978.
Atlantic reporter slams Schultz with sarcasm
“It’s cool how this guy is simultaneously like ‘I’m here to unite the country and leave nasty partisan politics behind’ and ‘those who criticize me are literally un-American.'” — Rosie Gray, The Atlantic.
She was responding to Independent possible presidential hopeful Howard Schultz who wrote, “To become better, we must repair our broken two-party system. To those who say a third choice can’t succeed, I say that’s as un-American as you can get.”
Rep. Eric Swalwell (D) for prez?
“Rep. Eric Swalwell to me about his thinking on 2020 at this point: ‘I’m close to making a decision. I’ll be in New Hampshire tomorrow so I’m excited for that.'” — Annie Grayer, CNN.
Reporter eats less than 15g of carbs a day
“I don’t eat meat. I’m primarily living on kale, broccoli, avocado and pea protein shakes. I’m doing less than 15g of carbs a day, to be specific for the lunatics who care too much.” — Cassandra Fairbanks, reporter, The Gateway Pundit.
Lawmaker to Howard Schultz: ‘Spare us the condescension’
“Dear @HowardSchultz: You have the right to run for President just like any other billionaire. But you and your consultants should spare us the condescension. Democrats don’t need to be saved. We are doing just fine. We crushed it in 2018 and we will win again in 2020.” —Rep. Ted Lieu (D-Calif.)
Today In Unnecessary Tweeting
“A blanket I put in my kitchen to keep out the draft froze to the door.” — Lyz Lenz, writer, Columbia Journalism Review.
“I wuv pudding.” — Pardes Seleh, former scriptwriter, Fox News. (RELATED: Ex-Fox News Employee Has Tough Time Finding Roommates)
A Chicago political sex scandal involves massages and Viagra
“I want to get a good massage, with a nice ending. Do you know any good places? …“Oh good. Good, good, good. I like Asian.” — Retiring Chicago Alderman Danny Solis, who allegedly asked for that “blue medicine” — a.k.a. Viagra. Here.
Stormy Daniels: I am NOT a victim!
“Never said I was a victim. I have not broken any laws so not a criminal either. “Bribed the president”? I bribed him to do what exactly? Haha! But most importantly…there are rules to horseslutdom?? I haven’t gotten the handbook yet! Oopsies!” — Stormy Daniels, an adult film actress who said she had sex with President Trump in 2006.
She was responding to an account calling itself “Team Trump,” which said, “You aren’t a victim. You are a criminal. Bribing the president and breaking the rules of a #horseslut.”
Back in December, Stormy had a great time at a D.C. strip club called the Cloakroom.
Why she keeps her day job…
“There are a few reasons that leaving my 10-6 job doesn’t feel possible, but looking ahead, the main obstacle is health insurance. I know there’s nothing unusual in this, and coming from my position of comparative privilege it feels almost frivolous to mention. But it also seems worth all of us saying it, over and over, until something changes.” — Maud Newton, author contracted by Randomhouse. Bylines: NYT Mag; Harpers.
Darla Shine praises Cernovich film
“@Cernovich Just watched #Hoaxed and Wow, this documentary is a must see and should be required curriculum in Journalism 101. #SocialMedia has changed the way we get #information Cernovich did a great job. Whether you hate him or not, watch!” — Darla Shine, wife of Bill Shine, White House deputy chief of staff for Communications.
Just Asking Questions
“So what happens to the Howard Schultz news cycle when a public poll shows him in low single digits?” — Dave Weigel, reporter, The Washington Post.
Cory Booker wants Congress to pass anti-lynching bill
“The vicious attack on actor Jussie Smollett was an attempted modern-day lynching. I’m glad he’s safe.
To those in Congress who don’t feel the urgency to pass our Anti-Lynching bill designating lynching as a federal hate crime– I urge you to pay attention.” —Sen. Cory Booker (D-N.J.).
Eavesdrop Café
“I am at the airport listening to two older people try and one up each other with stories about extreme deep water diving in Indonesia and Fiji.” — Nathaniel Friedman, writer, GQ.
Gossip roundup
Congressman puts Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez in her place. Here. Rep. Ocasio-Cortez deserves to be put in her place. She recently freaked out about this story.
Female TSA employees are freezing their asses off… The ladies room at the HQ in Arlington is ice cold. Here.
The hell of covering R & B star R. Kelly… two reporters covering the story must watch their backs. One has a guard stationed outside her home. Here.
Revenge is swift… Roger Stone says CNN’s Jake Tapper is “light in his loafers.” Here.
Splinter’s Jack Mirkinson is merciless with ABC “The View” co-host Meghan McCain. Here.
One of Bill Cosby‘s accusers dies of natural causes. Here.
The Observer
“I don’t care if billionaires have their taxes raised. Most billionaires would throw all of us into gulags. And that goes double for you Trump supporters. Look at how they treated Alex Jones. Let these people have some of the ‘home cooking’ they have served the rest of us.” — Mike Cernovich, documentary filmmaker, conservative commentator.
Ellen producer talks openly about his depression
“I’m not ashamed of my depression. I’m so grateful for the treatment I’ve been able to receive for it. One hashtag is saving actual lives today just by using it in your tweets. #BellLetsTalk.” — Andy Lassner, executive producer, The Ellen Show.
