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Irish author Rowan Somerville wins Literary Review Bad Sex in Fiction Award

At long last, the most heated literary contest of the year has been decided.

Irish author Rowan Somerville edged out Alastair Campbell to win the Literary Review Bad Sex in Fiction Award, a prize that ‘celebrates crude, tasteless or ridiculous descriptions of sex in modern literature.’ According to the judges, Somerville’s novel contained several exemplary, cringe worthy passages.  One line in particular, “Like a lepidopterist mounting a tough-skinned insect with a too blunt pin he screwed himself into her,” really blew them away.  We can’t blame them — it doesn’t get much worse.

The Irishman said he was honored to receive the award for his second novel, The Shape of Her.  In his acceptance speech, Somerville also said, “there is nothing more English than bad sex, so on behalf of the entire nation I would like to thank you.”

In case you’re itching for more bad sex scenes — and who isn’t — fear not.  Other shortlisted titles include The Slap by Christos Tsiolkas, Freedom by Jonathan Franzen, The Golden Mean by Annabel Lyon and Mr Peanut by Adam Ross.