The Daily Caller

The Daily Caller

Charlie Sheen’s rambling radio interview: ‘I’m an F-18, bro, and I will destroy you’ [VIDEO]

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Actor Charlie Sheen unloaded during an incoherent radio interview with Alex Jones on Thursday, claiming he doesn’t get enough credit from “Two and a Half Men” creator Chuck Lorre.

“There’s something this side of deplorable that a certain Chaim Levine — yeah, that’s [Chuck Lorre's] real name — mistook this rock star for his own selfish exit strategy, bro,” Sheen said. “Check it, Alex: I embarrassed him in front of his children and the world by healing at a pace that his unevolved mind cannot process. Last I checked, Chaim, I spent close to the last decade effortlessly and magically converting your tin cans into pure gold. And the gratitude I get is this charlatan chose not to do his job, which is to write. Clearly someone who believes he’s above the law. Well, you’ve been warned, dude, bring it.”

“I violently hate Chaim Levine [Chuck Lorre]. He’s a stupid, stupid little man and a pussy punk that I’d never want to be like,” Sheen told TMZ on Thursday. “That’s me being polite.”

Sheen referred to the women in his life as “the goddesses.”

“I don’t believe the term is good enough, but when you’re bound by these terrestrial descriptions, you must choose the best choice available, right?” Sheen said.

Among many other things, Sheen slammed “bible grippers,” haters with “ugly wives and ugly children,” and Alcoholics Anonymous.

“Look what I’m dealing with, man. I’m dealing with fools and trolls,” Sheen said. “I’m dealing with soft targets, and it’s just strafing runs in my underwear before my first cup of coffee … they lay down with their ugly wives and their ugly children and just look at their loser lives and then they look at me and say, ‘I can’t process it.’ Well, no, and you never will! Stop trying! Just sit back and enjoy the show.”

Sheen asserts that his sole addiction is victory and that no one has the right to judge him.

“The only thing I’m addicted to is winning. This bootleg cult, arrogantly referred to as Alcoholics Anonymous, reports a 5 percent success rate. My success rate is 100 percent,” Sheen said.

Though he recently underwent a rehab stint, Sheen is certain he has cured his substance issues.

“I cured it with my brain, with my mind. I cured it, I’m done … you don’t look like you’re having a lot of fun. I’m gonna hang out with these two smoking hotties and fly privately around the world,” Sheen said.

“I got magic and I got poetry in my fingertips, most of the time, and this includes naps,” Sheen said. “I’m an F-18, bro, and I will destroy you in the air and I will deploy my ordinance to the ground.”

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  • bozsbusiness

    This idiot assaults WOMEN!! Enough said; I wish he would spout off and get in the face of a real man. Lightning fists! Ha.
    Someone needs to give him a parking lot style a@#-kicking.

  • bellh

    Get it together Charlie you will be missed,i love the show laugh my axes off.To bad we hold him to such a high mark,we don’t hold politicians to that where are Wisc demos hiding under a rock at least Charlie isn’t BS us and stealing our future.

    • http://www.facebook.com/people/Atomly-Lee/708978241 Atomly Lee

      Wow, did you honestly just compare Charlie Sheen’s epic, spiraling self-destruction to the political standoff taking place in Wisconsin? You are my new hero. One is a group of people coming together to take a stand for what they believe in and what they consider to be the will of the people, while the other is just some sad, middle-aged, middle-brow actor throwing a temper tantrum and shouting to the world about how awrsome he is, because he thinks maybe if he says it enough times, he and the public might actually start to believe it.

      Probably my favorite part of this is how he jumps all over the place- one minute he’s bragging about how impossibly easy it is for him to win, the next he’s getting borderline anti-Semitic attacking his producer and finally he ends up talking about the magic/poetry in his fingers and his and Alex’s matching hernias (maybe that’s why they have matching raspydude voices, too.

      Anyway, unless it comes out that the WI Dems are shacked up in Chicago with 2+ hookers and an eight ball each, or that Charlie’s whole stunt was clever misdirection used to engage the media and placate the public while Mr. Sheen worked tirelessly behind the scenes to negotiate an enduring and historic compromise between the two bitterly-divided that maintains the power and spirit of the unions while still making the tough choices that will narrow the budget gap now and will ultimately lead to a balanced budget, I think it’s more than a bit disingenuous to compare the two.

      • johnk144

        “Wow, did you honestly just compare Charlie Sheen’s epic, spiraling self-destruction to the political standoff taking place in Wisconsin?”

        “throwing a temper tantrum and shouting to the world about how awesome [they are], because [they] think maybe if [they] say it enough times, [they] and the public might actually start to believe it.”

        Sounds like a fairly accurate comparison to me.

        • redla

          Well done!
          Charlie is also a 9/11 Truther.

  • Injest

    “I got magic and I got poetry in my fingertips, most of the time, and this includes naps,” Sheen said. “I’m an F-18, bro, and I will destroy you in the air and I will deploy my ordinance to the ground.”

    Lighten up, Francis.