1.) Debt’s a wrap? — Is the world’s biggest and most boring game of Chicken almost over? TheDC’s Amanda Carey reports: “Republican and Democratic lawmakers reportedly reached a deal on the debt limit on Sunday night. The compromise comes after a weekend of failed votes and long discussions between leaders of the respective parties in an effort to avoid a first-ever American debt default on August 2. Emerging from one such meeting on Sunday, Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid told assembled reporters, ‘We’re moving forward together.’ Minority Leader Mitch McConnell followed up by saying, ‘There is now a framework.’ President Barack Obama confirmed a deal had been reached in a press briefing Sunday night, saying what while it was not the deal he wanted, it will ‘allow us to avoid default and end the crisis Washington imposed on the rest of America.'” Hey wow, it’s Obama vs. Washington. Maybe somebody will buy that. As for Speaker Boehner, he said: “I’m gonna tell you, this has been a long battle — we’ve fought valiantly — and frankly we’ve done it by listening to the American people. And as a result, our framework is now on the table that will end this crisis in a manner that meets our principles of smaller government.” Which sounds weird — Principles? Smaller government? — but hey, anything’s possible. If you’re still not sold, Emanuel Cleaver is calling the bill a “sugar-coated Satan sandwich.” And lots of other lefties are shrieking about the “terrorists” who won’t just shut up and do things their way. Don’t take it personally, though, tea-rrorists. These guys are only lashing out at you because there’s no way to fight their real enemy: Math.
2.) Ron Johnson feels queasy — And libs can take heart: Republicans are ticked off too. TheDC’s Jeff Poor reports: “On Sunday night’s special edition of ‘On the Record with Greta van Susteren’ on the Fox News Channel, Wisconsin Republican Sen. Ron Johnson expressed his frustration over the deal by calling it ‘disgusting.’ ‘Even right now we are supposedly talking about a deal that will be $2.4-trillion worth,’ Johnson said. ‘Think about what that is: $2.4-million-million worth. You just have a couple people negotiating this. I mean, it is ridiculous. We’re talking about the federal government’s budget here… Ten years ago we spent $1.8 trillion. This year we will spend $3.6 trillion, and more. What the president’s budget would do after 10 years: Increase that from $3.7 to $5.7 trillion. He would spend $46 trillion. And all we are doing is lowering that by, what, $900 billion? …It may be a step in the right direction, but it is not fixing the problem.” Then he ripped open his shirt to reveal an “I [Heart] Al Qaeda” t-shirt underneath, while grabbing the can of cat food out of your grandma’s hands before she could even take a bite.
3.) Obama goes on television again to say even more words about your money — TheDC’s Neil Munro reports: “President Barack Obama used a brief Sunday night appearance to appeal to independent voters and to distance himself from the debt ceiling compromise hashed out by leaders in Congress — even while indicating he would sign it. ‘Is this the deal I would have preferred? No. I believe we could have made the tough choices on entitlement reform and tax reform right now,’ the president said in his short and low-key statement. Numerous polls show that the critical swing-voting independents are alarmed at the federal government’s $14.3 trillion debt and favor some spending cuts, along with reform of entitlement programs… Obama made sure to remind progressives and liberals disappointed by the Sunday deal that he supports their preference for tax increases over spending cuts. The second half of the two-step debt ceiling process, he said, offers another opportunity for progressives to win some gains, including tax increases, which he has said round out a ‘balanced approach.'” So when Obama says he wants to make “tough choices,” he means tough choices about how much more money should be taken from the pockets of those who, according to him, don’t deserve it. Better luck next time, Barry.
4.) Trump still Trump — Great news, everybody. Donald Trump is still talking about running for president. CNBC: “Real estate mogul Donald Trump said Friday he’d consider running for president — again — if the U.S. economy ‘continues to be bad’ and ‘if the Republicans pick the wrong candidate.’ ‘I would give it very, very serious thought,’ he told CNBC. ‘There are so many people wanting me to do it.'” For example, there’s Donald Trump. He’s really keen on the idea. Another big fan is Donald Trump. Oh, and also Donald Trump. So that’s at least three right there.
5.) Shaq told to step baq from Baraq — Even Shaq is helpless against the Secret Service’s defense. TheDC’s Laura Donovan reports: “Basketball legend Shaquille O’Neal is not as tough as he looks. The seven-foot tall former NBA star attempted to enter the White House during his visit to Washington Friday, but was apparently turned away by security guards. Shaq, who chronicled his D.C. excursions via Twitter and Tout video program, donned a wife-beater tank top and yellow cap during his attempt to see President Obama. Speaking to the camera, Shaq said, ‘I need your help. I’m in Washington, D.C. Do you think I can stand in front of the White House and get into the White House and see Obama? Or do you think I will be denied? …I’m sad I can’t see President Obama … Whyyyyy?! Obama!’ Shaq said in a video from his car, whimpering to Rihanna’s song ‘Unfaithful.'” So… yeah. That happened.
6.) Today’s words of wisdom from Adam Baldwin’s Twitter feed — “Shorter Reid/Durbin: ‘We Leftists don’t want to play by the rules. We’re trying to fundamentally change the world, so we shouldn’t have to.'”
VIDEO: The most entertaining clips about the debt ceiling debate
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