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TheDC Morning: Americans need jobs? Just pass an American Jobs Act!

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1.) Americans need jobs? Just pass an American Jobs Act! — The stimulus bill stimulated the economy, so why shouldn’t a jobs bill create jobs? TheDC’s Amanda Carey reports: “The weather outside wasn’t the only storm enveloping Capitol Hill on Thursday night. Inside the House chamber, a confrontational President Barack Obama presented his $450 billion American Jobs Act to a joint session of Congress. He caught lawmakers off guard by announcing his intent to release a plan to reduce the deficit on September 19. Considered to be his last chance to jolt an economic recovery and retake control of Washington’s agenda, Obama called on lawmakers to come together and solve the unemployment crisis that has plagued the nation. In fact, Obama implored Congress to ‘pass this bill’ nearly twenty times during his address… According to Obama, the plan will focus on creating jobs for construction workers, teachers and veterans. It will also include a tax break for companies who hire new workers and cut payroll taxes in half for working Americans and small businesses. It would additionally extend unemployment insurance for at least another year. ‘It will provide a jolt to an economy that has stalled, and give companies confidence that if they invest and hire, there will be customers for their products and services,’ said Obama. ‘You should pass this jobs plan right away.'” You know how a little kid thinks if he just keeps stomping his feet and making the same demand over and over, eventually he’ll get what he wants? Incidentally, here’s one of the indications of Narcissistic Personality Disorder: “has a sense of entitlement, i.e., unreasonable expectations of especially favorable treatment or automatic compliance with his or her expectations.” Probably just a coincidence! Well, now that the American Jobs Act has solved this problem, Obama should schedule a big speech to announce the Everything Is Okay Now and You’re Going to Reelect Me Act. P.S. If you want to read the bill, you should know better by now. It doesn’t actually exist. See, under the Obama administration, a promise is considered an accomplishment. And he sure does have a lot of accomplishments. P.P.S. TheDC’s Mickey Kaus on the speech: “More effective than expected. Would have been even more effective if he’d stopped about halfway through.”

2.) Joe Wilson was right — You might want to sit down for this one: Obama said some things last night that aren’t strictly true. The Associated Press reports: “President Barack Obama’s promise Thursday that everything in his jobs plan will be paid for rests on highly iffy propositions. It will only be paid for if a committee he can’t control does his bidding, if Congress puts that into law and if leaders in the future — the ones who will feel the fiscal pinch of his proposals — don’t roll it back. Underscoring the gravity of the nation’s high employment rate, Obama chose a joint session of Congress, normally reserved for a State of the Union speech, to lay out his proposals. But if the moment was extraordinary, the plan he presented was conventional Washington rhetoric in one respect: It employs sleight-of-hand accounting.” Among the shaky claims: “Everything in this bill will be paid for. Everything.” “Everything in here is the kind of proposal that’s been supported by both Democrats and Republicans, including many who sit here tonight.” “It will not add to the deficit.” “The American Jobs Act answers the urgent need to create jobs right away.” Other than that, though, it was real talk. Obama thinks whatever he says magically becomes the truth because he’s the one saying it. Which worked for a while, but only for a while.

3.) Solynd-raided — Just hours before Obama tried to convince America that the way to create jobs is to flush hundreds of billions more taxpayer dollars down the toilet, one of his previous boondoggles got a visit from the Feds. TheDC’s Amanda Carey reports: “Agents from the Federal Bureau of Investigation raided the offices of the now-bankrupt Solyndra on Thursday morning, according to the San Jose Mercury News. The alternative-energy company announced its intent to file bankruptcy on August 31, after securing a loan guarantee from the federal government of $535 million to manufacture solar panels. According to news reports, the FBI served a search warrant on behalf of the Department of Energy (DOE). The DOE, however, was responsible for the loan guarantee program that issued the taxpayer-funded loan to begin with… The FBI refused to comment on what the search warrant was for, and what was seized.” Did Obama leave his umbrella?

4.) Will Welprin weplace Weiner? — Wow, Internet access just keeps getting more and more expensive. Posting a picture of your penis costs half a million dollars! TheDC’s Alexis Levinson reports: “In an indication that Democrats are worried about the surprisingly competitive special election to replace former congressman Anthony Weiner in New York’s 9th Congressional District, the Democratic Congressional Campaign Committee (DCCC) made a $483,500 ad buy in support of Democratic candidate David Weprin in the final days before the election… The move suggests that national Democrats are concerned that Weprin could lose the race to his Republican opponent Bob Turner.” But Weprin doesn’t need to worry because his party is making all the right moves, according to Politico: “Just hours after releasing it, the Democratic Congressional Campaign Committee pulled a TV ad set to air for next week’s New York special election. The problem was an image of a plane flying over the Manhattan skyline — meant to be a corporate jet to represent Republican Bob Turner’s support for corporate tax loopholes — that evoked anger in some corners for the echoes it brought up just days before the 10th anniversary of the Sept. 11 attacks.” Money well spent, Dems! Anthony Weiner salutes you, and he’s got the snapshots to prove it.

5.) Glee vs. music — In these uncertain times, there’s one thing you can count on: Dave Grohl is our last real rock star. TheDC’s Laura Donovan reports: “Foo Fighters rocker Dave Grohl reiterated his lack of interest in participating in the musical TV series Glee during a Wednesday Chelsea Lately appearance. Speaking to host Chelsea Handler, Grohl addressed the conflict he encountered earlier this year when he said it’s ‘every band’s right … [not to] have to do f***ing Glee’ or give the teen program permission to perform his songs. ‘I read somewhere that the creator of Glee, who I never met — and I’ve really only watched three minutes of the show, I don’t really watch TV — I read something where he was kind of mouthing off about some friends of mine in rock bands,’ Grohl told Handler. ‘And I just felt like, you know, as a musician, you should be able to say no…” Just Say No, kids… to Glee!

6.) Today’s words of wisdom from Alec Baldwin’s Truther, er, Twitter feed — “Rick Perry says Soc. Sec. is a Ponzi Scheme. Or does he just hate it bc GOP bankers can’t get their hands on that $, like W wanted?”

VIDEO: Jamie Weinstein debates economy, vitriolic rhetoric on ‘The Big Picture’

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