Opinion

Seven things that would make America a better place but would never happen

Rod Pennington Author, A Family Reunion
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Nothing weighing less than 8 ounces should be eligible for the endangered species list. Snail darters, sand dune lizards and delta smelts shouldn’t make the cut. This trio of “endangered” species managed to nearly stop the construction of a major dam in Tennessee, is about to stop oil drilling in Texas and has crippled the farming industry in California.

These are dubious species to protect — the snail darter wasn’t even known to exist until anti-growth activist began scouring rural Tennessee in the early 1970s looking for any reason to stop the Tellico Dam. Allowing agenda-driven activists to define what is or isn’t endangered is borderline insanity. Save the whales, save the elephants and save the tigers. Saving things that most sane people would consider pests? Not so much.

No one should be allowed to run for federal office until they’ve spent at least two years working in the private sector. Working as an academic, a community organizer, a non-profit staffer or a prosecutor wouldn’t count. People would have to have held a real job with a company that is not in any way funded by taxpayer dollars — a company with a payroll, customers and a profit and loss statement and that has to deal with OSHA, the EPA, the IRS, etc. Anyone who has served in the military and spent at least two years in a combat zone would be exempt.

George McGovern, the former senator and presidential candidate, opened a bed and breakfast after retiring from a lifetime of “public service.” He was bankrupt in less than a year. Later he famously said:

In retrospect, I wish I had known more about the hazards and difficulties of such a business. … I wish that during the years I was in public office I had this firsthand experience about the difficulties business people face every day. That knowledge would have made me a better senator and a more understanding presidential contender. … To create job opportunities, we need entrepreneurs who will risk their capital against an expected payoff. Too often, however, public policy does not consider whether we are choking off those opportunities.

Unfortunately this epiphany occurred after McGovern had spent years piling rules and regulations on his fellow citizens. The country would be a better place if he had acquired private sector experience before going into politics.

The draft should be reinstituted. Our country suffered when we moved to an all-volunteer army. Having Harvard elitists fight alongside good old boys from Tennessee, cowboys from Wyoming and surfers from California was good for society — it helped people understand their fellow citizens. Despite some of the nonsense Kerry spouted after he returned from Vietnam, when the Swift Boat story broke, many of the men who had served with Kerry were willing to vouch for him. Serving together in the military builds those kinds of bonds. Without this intermingling of the classes, America is becoming more and more like 19th-century England, a country where the nobles never mix with the peasants.

Courts should focus on protecting the rights of citizens instead of on protecting the rights of criminals. Today we have military veterans who’ve risked their lives for their county living in cardboard boxes under bridges while murders, rapists and drug dealers not only get three hots and a cot but also cable TV, porn and conjugal visits. In California, they can also petition to have the state fund their $50,000 sex change operations.

Too often, honest citizens are victimized twice. First they are abused by thugs. Then they are abused by the authorities, who are more concerned about avoiding being sued by the criminals than they are about actually protecting the people who pay their salaries.

Former presidents should not be allowed to appear in public. Ex-presidents should only appear in public to attend funerals — and preferably not until their own.

To be considered legal residents of their states, all members of Congress should have to meet their states’ minimum residency requirements. In most cases, where you spend 183 nights each calendar year is considered your legal residency. This prevents people who own a second home in Florida, which has no income tax, from avoiding state taxes where they live and work most of the year. Imagine if the same rule were applied to every member of Congress. Not only would Congress only be in session four to five months each year, its members would actually have to spend time with the people they claim to represent instead of hobnobbing at Georgetown parties and shilling lobbyists for campaign cash. This would also prevent the embarrassment of someone like Senator Lugar of Indiana not owning a home in the state he allegedly represents.

Tolerance should be a two-way street. Whenever a cranky atheist parent feels “uncomfortable,” Santa Claus and Jesus get kicked to the curb, regardless of how the school’s hundreds of other parents feel. But when parents are uncomfortable about their second graders discussing gay sex and their sixth graders being taught how to put condoms on bananas, they are told to get over it.

Tolerance doesn’t mean you need to embrace something or be required to celebrate it. It just means you need to tolerate it. The majority has to tolerate politically correct nonsense on things from sex to global warming. Maybe it’s time for a few of those on the fringes of social issues to man up and quit complaining.

Anyone who thinks their children will be forever scarred by a 30-second benediction before a high school graduation or by having someone wish them “Merry Christmas” probably needs professional help.

Rod Pennington’s latest novel, A Family Reunion, is a dark comedy about a dysfunctional family of assassins with Washington politics as a backdrop.

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