10 things you definitely should not give your significant other on Valentine’s Day [SLIDESHOW]

Look, in a perfect world nobody would ever have to give anyone else a Valentine’s Day present because it’s a dumb holiday and it makes people more stressed out than it makes them happy.

But life’s not fair, so unless you have a really cool significant other who will allow you to forgo crappy chocolates and forced dinner reservations, you are probably going to have to come up with something to give him or her.

If you are being forced into this manufactured day of love, here are 10 things that are worse than not giving your boyfriend/girlfriend/spouse anything at all.

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  • "Hey honey, I couldn't think of what to get you for Valentine's Day, so I decided to pull out all the stops to PLAN YOUR FUNERAL." (Via http://twitpic.com/8hwk77)
  • "_______ for Dummies" isn't the right message to send on Valentine's Day, no matter how dumb your boyfriend or girlfriend may be.
  • No matter how much you want your husband to take the hint that he should do more stuff around the house, don't get him a lawnmower. Wait until the day after.
  • No matter how awesome you think this is, she probably won't.
  • Do you really need an explanation for why you shouldn't give your boyfriend/ girlfriend a gym membership? You're on your own on this one.
  • Because nothing says, "I'm kind of over you" like a household appliance.
  • You should DEFINITELY NOT give your woman a $29,000, four feet tall teddy bear with an accompanying diamond ring. This is perhaps the most offensive item on this list. Even if this were free, you should not give it to anyone ever.
  • Edible Arrangements suggest that your beloved isn't good enough for real cupcakes and only cupcakes made out of fruit. This makes us sad.
  • Do not suggest the "gift" of a threesome. Not the right time, dude.
  • Ladies, these Valentine's Day themed golf balls are sure to land you in the sand trap. (Golf metaphor!)

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