DC Trawler

Who wants to move to North Colorado?

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If you’re reading this, chances are that our moral, ethical, and intellectual betters on the left already think you’re a gun-toting, teabagging, creepy-ass cracker. Well, soon you might have a new place to call home.

CBS News:

There’s a growing effort to create a 51st state out of parts of northeast Colorado and southwestern Nebraska.

Ten counties started talking about seceding last month. Now some people in Lincoln and Cheyenne counties say they want to join a new state they’d call “North Colorado,” reports CBS Denver station KCNC-TV.

Organizers of the secession effort say their interests are not being represented at the state Capitol…

The secessionist movement is the result of a growing urban-rural divide, which was exacerbated after this year’s legislation session, where lawmakers raised renewable energy standards for rural electric co-ops, floated bills increasing regulations on oil and gas and passed sweeping gun control.

They want to start their own state, just because they’re greedy for the freedom and liberty that’s being taken away from them by their heedless leaders? That’s positively un-American! Why, we fought a war against the British Empire to guarantee every American’s right to do as he’s told and shut up about it.

Good luck, hayseeds. “North Colorado” isn’t very original, though. How about “Little America”? “Constitutionland”? Let’s brainstorm, you guys, we can come up with something better.

Update: The Colorado legislature might want to remember what happened the last time a bunch of commies tried to take over that state…

Update:

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Jim Treacher