There are some people in this world who are in love with objects. Not like you love your iPhone or your new boots or your favorite book. These people are in love with inanimate objects like you are in love with Kate Upton.
A documentary titled “Animism” about people with “objective sexuality” premiered on the Logo channel Monday night and featured several people who were actually romantically in love with bridges, cars, a Monopoly board, the Statue of Liberty. Then there was Linda Ducharme, who is married to a ferris wheel.
“I love Bruce for who he is. He’s a skydiver, he’s made of fiberglass, he’s made of steel and aluminum. I love his mechanical aspects — I love the smell of the hydraulics and the oil that runs through him,” Ducharme said.
Ducharme also previously had romantic relationships with an airplane and a train used at a locomotive company she worked for. Someone once caught her and the train in a “romantic embrace” and she was fired, because apparently interoffice or interspecies romances were not acceptable.
Ducharme finally found her true love in a ferris wheel she calls Bruce. Bruce was a dilapidated, unwanted circus ride before Ducharme came along to save him by fixing him up and painting him blue. After eating pizza and engaging in a romantic moment (something that we do not want to know the definition of), the two married last year. With rings and everything. (Bruce, you should know, is not a fully-functioning ferris wheel, but just a bunch of light blue steel in a pile.)
Since Bruce is a large pile of steel, Ducharme takes a piece of Bruce wherever she travels and sleeps with him at night. Her friend, a nondenominational minister named CJ who she met on Facebook and who happens to be in love with his soundboard, officiated a recommitment ceremony between Ducharme and Bruce at the end of the documentary.
It was beautiful. And so, so bizarre.
Watch the documentary below. The entire 41 minutes is worth it.