You can now officially add a mini-epidemic of urination-themed vandalism to the long list of things that make you wonder just what the hell is wrong with America these days.
Near the campus of the University of Florida in Gainesville, police say they are actively searching for a man who has been running around peeing on people.
The University of Florida pee bandit has struck on at least three occasions — Feb. 22, Feb. 26 and March 1 — at different campus locales, Fox News reports.
Each time, his victims were innocently standing with their backs turned when, they say, they suddenly couldn’t help but notice a damp, constant flowing sensation, according to The Gainesville Sun.
When the victims turned around, the pee bandit fled. He is described as black man with a chunkier build, about six feet tall, maybe 25 to 30 years old. He has been seen wearing baggy jeans and a hoodie.
Meanwhile, in a small town in Texas, somebody allegedly peed all over some poor freshman high school student’s stuff while he was practicing for some unidentified extracurricular event.
The incident occurred on the campus of Pleasanton High School in the town of Pleasant, about 30 miles south of San Antonio.
School district officials told local CBS affiliate KENS that the freshman is a male and that the incident occurred earlier this week.
No one knows anything about the Texas pee bandit, though the school district has promised a thorough investigation.