Anthony Weiner sent pictures of his penis to a bunch of women, told hilarious lies about it, resigned from Congress in disgrace, waited a while, ran for mayor of NYC, and then got caught sending even more pictures of his penis to even more women. That’s when his political career finally went bye-bye. (For now!)
But fortunately for him, he’s also married to Hillary Clinton’s gal Friday and fax-machine coach. It pays to be that close to someone who’s that close to power, which is why he now has the least likely job you’d ever expect anybody to give him.
A top “crisis” public-relations firm with ties to Hillary Rodham Clinton has hired the last person in the world that most people would call on to dispense advice on dealing with a scandal: disgraced, penis-texting former Congressman Anthony Weiner.
The man who destroyed his own promising political career by botching a 2011 sext-message imbroglio with bald-faced lies — and who then ruined his comeback by running one of the most disastrous mayoral campaigns of all time — will now get paid to dispense advice to high-paying clients of the MWW p.r. firm, sources told The Post.
About the only thing that makes sense about this is that one of the company’s clients is Ball Park Franks.
Get it?
If you find yourself embroiled in scandal and you don’t care how you spend your money, now you can hire Anthony Weiner to help you out. Here’s his simple 5-step system for managing a PR crisis:
- Claim you were hacked
- Or pranked
- Or punked
- Whatever it’s called
- Be married to Huma Abedin
It’s as simple as that!
Oh, and Weiner was also in Sharknado 3 last night. He played some kind of NASA mission-control guy, because how kuh-RAY-zee is that? He actually wasn’t bad, at least by Sharknado standards. (He may or may not have been eaten by a shark? Like, chomped in the crotch, maybe? I can’t really remember because by the end of the flick, I was too busy trying to guesstimate David Hasselhoff’s BAC.)
Speaking of Sharknado 3, the producers cut Jared Fogle’s cameo because of his current PR problems. He should get ahold of Weiner and hang on for dear life.
P.S. Today is National Hot Dog Day.
