Washington is a yawner compared to this.
Back in March, The Mirror bragged about having an infamous pooper in my hometown.
As disgusting as it was, the Akron Poop Bandit, as he was called, had defecated in or on some 19 parked cars.
Well now, the pooper has a partner in crime. Weirdly, it’s the former Akron mayor, Don Plusquellic, 65, who resigned in May after 28 years. Last Wednesday just before midnight, police caught him urinating on a tree at the University of Akron. They gave him a warning.
Is he incontinent or was he just in a mood?
“As of Thursday, dear ol’ Akron, Ohio, is known for both No. 1 and No. 2,” wrote Bob Dyer, a columnist for the Akron Beacon Journal. “No. 2 came first (which, in my experience, is usually not the case).”
Dyer had quite an admission later in his story.
“To be sure, a lot of other people (perhaps including your favorite columnist) have stopped the car to pee once or twice or 35 times in their lives,” he wrote. Wait…WHAT? He continued, “But most of us opt for a much more isolated location. And most of us are not former presidents of the U.S. Conference of Mayors.”
Unfortunately Plusquellic, who hates the Akron Beacon Journal, had no excuses.
“I do not believe that my hometown newspaper is interested in the truth,” he said when he resigned. “I’m done fighting this madness.”
Correction: The Mirror had her numbers wrong. The actual time the publicly peeing former mayor spent in office was 28 years. Not 18 as I previously thought.