Editorial

Matt Gaetz Suggests That Drinking A Bunch Of Alcohol Can Kill The Coronavirus

(Photo by Mark Wilson/Getty Images)

David Hookstead Sports And Entertainment Editor
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Republican Florida Rep. Matt Gaetz thinks enough alcohol could keep you safe from the coronavirus.

As fears about the coronavirus spread across the world, people are all trying to find an edge to stay healthy and safe. It turns out, alcohol might play a helpful role. (RELATED: David Hookstead Is The True King In The North When It Comes To College Football)

“In my experience, the things you consume on spring break will typically consume the coronavirus,” Gaetz, who wore a gas mask while voting Wednesday, responded when asked by TMZ if people should cancel their spring break plans in his home state of Florida.

You can watch his full comments below.

Well, looks like we found our strategy for making sure March Madness goes off without a hitch. If boozing on spring break can kill the coronavirus, then there’s no reason it can’t do the same for college basketball.

We’re not drinking anymore because we want to get a buzz and enjoy the games. We’re drinking for our literal health and safety.

At this point, it’d be irresponsible to not drink another beer. Again, we’re not doing it for ourselves. We’re doing it to kill the virus.

We really don’t have a choice. If the things consumed on spring break kill the coronavirus, then I see no reason it wouldn’t work for beer and March Madness.

Luckily, this would seem like an easy experiment to test out. The tournament will be here soon enough, and I guess I’ll just have to have a few beers.

Remember, I’m not drinking those beers for me. I’m drinking them for the safety of America. Am I a hero? That’s something we’ll let the history books decide.

Now, grab a gold one and protect yourself.

(No doctors have as of yet gone on record to recommend that a case race with your buddies could cure coronavirus.)