Hugh Hefner’s widow, Crystal, claimed her life was largely controlled in the Playboy Mansion in a People interview published Thursday.
She shared her story in her memoir, “Only Say Good Things: Surviving Playboy and Finding Myself.” The book was inspired by Hefner’s directive to his widow before his passing. “I want you to continue my legacy going forward…and I want to remind you to only say good things about me,” he allegedly said to Crystal, according to People. Crystal recalled her time with Hefner and decided to share her real story, instead of keeping her promise.
LOS ANGELES, CA – OCTOBER 24: Model Crystal Hefner (L) and Hugh Hefner attend the annual Halloween Party, hosted by Playboy and Hugh Hefner, at the Playboy Mansion on October 24, 2015 in Los Angeles, California. (Photo by Charley Gallay/Getty Images for Playboy)
Crystal said Hefner had a hold on the girls, and at one point in her life with him, this felt like a welcome situation.
“At the time I thought I was on top,” she said.
“I thought, wow, if I just like everything that he likes and do all the things that he wants me to do, then I’m the favorite. And I was, but I just lost myself in the process,” she told People.
She went on to say she and the other Playboy bunnies lived in a disheveled space, and were forced to upkeep their appearances in accordance to Hefner’s personal preferences.
Crystal detailed Hefner’s strict rules about how his girlfriends were instructed to use their “allowance,” noting that he stipulated the money was to be spent on making them look more beautiful – by his own definition. She said he weighed in on “weird, silly, stupid things,” such as the particulars of their grooming choices.
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“Our nail polish couldn’t be anything but some neutral color, no French manicure,” she said
Crystal recalled Hefner saying, “Don’t have a belly button ring because that’s trashy,” according to People.
“He would tell me ‘Wear the flag, That’s the Playboy logo and those shirts were uncomfortable and cheap.”
She went on to say Hefner pointed out her roots when they began growing back in, and she responded in accordance with his wishes, even though that meant significant self-sacrifice.
“So I’d have to go bleach it and it would burn my scalp and I’d have blisters,” she told People.
HOLLYWOOD, CA – APRIL 28: Playboy founder Hugh Hefner (L) and his fiancee Crystal Harris attend the TCM Classic Film Festival Opening Night Gala and World Premiere of the film “An American In Paris” at Grauman’s Chinese Theatre on April 28, 2011 in Hollywood, California. (Photo by Frederick M. Brown/Getty Images)
Hefner’s widow cleared up misconceptions about her lifestyle by pointing out the living conditions within Playboy Mansion.
“This place doesn’t really get cleaned that well and there’s mold, and it just felt just kind of run down and gross after a while. Too, too many parties. It was worn out,” she said.
She now admits she was unhappy with her life at the time.
“I realized I was dealing with a really big power imbalance,” Crystal said. (RELATED: ‘Kind Of Stockholm Syndrome’: Crystal Hefner Details Group Sex And Other Demands Made By Hugh Hefner)
“It seemed like a world of success and fantasy, but everyone’s having to sleep with an 80-year-old. There’s a price. Everything has a price.”