The Daily Caller

The Daily Caller
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Democrat warns that global warming is about to kill your college mascot FOREVER

Well, America, it’s been a dreary, snowy and crazy-cold winter across much of the nation. Take Chicago, for instance, which has seen the most days of zero or below in all of recorded history, according to the Chicago Tribune.

Of course, such inconvenient and bone-chilling facts have not stopped climate-change alarmists from trumpeting the gospel of global warming in any way possible.

On Tuesday, the National Wildlife Federation released a report called “Mascot Madness.” As U.S. News explains, the report describes in apocalyptic detail how climate change might soon wipe out a bunch of animals – and at least one tree – that are college mascots around the country.

The timing, of course, correlates with next week’s NCAA men’s basketball tournament.

The report warns that the situation is truly dire and calls for a massive overhaul of the nation’s energy sources and economy.

“In fact, what I would say – if you pardon the pun – is that the game may soon be over for many of our wildlife mascots unless we reduce our carbon pollution and develop new energy sources,” threatened Doug Inkley, a senior National Wildlife Federation scientist, according to U.S. News.

Democratic Rep. Donna Edwards got into the act by suggesting that Americans should consider the report when filling out March Madness brackets.

“I want to encourage you to look at the National Wildlife Federation report, match it up with those brackets, see those species that are in danger because of our changing climate,” Edwards, the ranking member of the House Science, Space and Technology Committee, told U.S. News.

If you are a fan of the Michigan Wolverines (Big Ten regular season champions), for example, Inkley says your ferocious, muscular carnivore of a mascot will go the way of the dodo in no time. (RELATED: Here are 10 awesome old-school college mascots)

“Wolverines are tenacious animals, like the sports teams at the University of Michigan, but they rely on deep snowpack for denning and to raise their young,” the scientist said, according to U.S. News. “This is disappearing as a result of climate change.”

Fans of Michigan’s hated rival, Ohio State, shouldn’t gloat, though, because “Ohio is no longer the most suitable climate to grow in” for the leafy buckeye tree.

Other beasts that climate change will surely annihilate soon include the red wolves that are the mascot of the North Carolina State Wolfpack and the alligators of Florida Gator fame—both because of coastal habitat destruction. The University of Maryland’s terrapins also face extinction because heat could cause a sex-ratio imbalance.

Follow Eric on Twitter and on Facebook, and send education-related story tips to erico@dailycaller.com.