Jim Treacher | All Articles

Jim Treacher

See You In July

Alright, kids. I'm taking some vacation time, so if anything interesting happens between now and July 3, you'll just have to imagine what sort of stupid take I would've had on it.

Germany Arrests 36 For Saying Things They Weren’t Supposed To Say

12:17 PM 06/21/2017

Germans like to tell people what they can and can't say. They want to tell everybody how to live their lives. As you may recall, a while back we had a bit of a disagreement with them about that whole attitude. It didn't turn out too well for them. But did they learn their lesson? Nein, das haben sie nicht.

The Philando Castile Shooting Is Indefensible

10:24 AM 06/21/2017

I've never been a police officer. I'm not going to pretend I know what it's like. And I'm very skeptical of the Black Lives Matter folks, who tend to ignore or twist any facts that don't fit their narrative. But after watching the dashcam footage of Minnesota police officer Jeronimo Yanez shooting Philando Castile, I don't see how anybody can defend it.

Moby Bravely Takes On Trump Just Like Everybody Else

2:30 PM 06/20/2017

You can tell we live in a fascist police state because whenever people criticize our leaders, they're sent off to concentration camps some dummies run onstage and yell at them. In the face of such horrible oppression, speaking truth to power requires incredible bravery. That's why it's so amazing that Moby, the popular '90s musician and living example of the long-term cognitive effects of animal-protein deprivation, has just released this music video.

Man Fights Pig, Loses

3:43 PM 06/19/2017

If you're like me -- and if you're reading this, I regret to inform you that you're more like me than you care to admit -- you love the great taste of pig. Bacon, ham, sausage, spare ribs, tenderloin... it's all good! Nutritious and delicious. Pigs are meant to be eaten.

Danney Williams To Bill Clinton: Happy Father’s Day, Dad

10:07 AM 06/19/2017

Last year, a young man in Arkansas named Danney Williams came out with the claim that William Jefferson Clinton is his biological father. There's just one problem with this assertion. In order for this to be true, it would mean that at some point in the past 30-odd years, Bill Clinton had sex with a woman other than Hillary.

London Mosque Attacker: ‘I Want To Kill All Muslims’

9:00 AM 06/19/2017

Hurting and killing people for their beliefs is wrong. Period. When somebody launches a terrorist attack and openly states why he's doing it, I'm not going to pretend I don't know his motive. No matter what that motive is. Facts don't care about my feelings.

Good Guy With Gun Apprehends Escaped Cop-Killers In Tennessee

1:15 PM 06/16/2017

Every time there's a high-profile shooting, we're told that the only solution is to get rid of all the guns. Apparently there's a magic wand that will make them all go away, and somehow we're preventing liberals from waving it. Then you hear a story like the following, and you have to wonder what would've happened if somebody didn't have a gun.